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#1 2009-05-14 11:02:40

bdk336
Member
Registered: 2009-03-31
Posts: 277
Website

A prose piece I wrote in school

I wrote this for a school assignment to write a poem or prose piece with the theme of "light and dark" and just thought to put it up here. Note that the lack of paragraphs stems from lack of editing and that it looks much better double spaced (don't know if you can double space on this forum).

People fear the dark. They think it unnatural, blotting out their precious light. Never seeing the good, assuming the worst. And never realizing, that the dark they fear exists only in thought. That it is nothing, simply the world absent of the light they love. They cling to light like children to a blanket, never relishing their gift but always afraid to let it out of their control. They fear it will flee, leave them to the dark forever. It is this which they justify, convincing themselves the thing they fear has no place in the universe. They do not realize that light and dark are intertwined. Although the one has energy and the other does not, they need each other. All we perceive through the mind. The mind perceives the world through contrast, remove the dark or the light and the mind will perceive neither, we will perceive neither. One who understands not this nature of light and dark, understands not the world as born from these two. They do not see that light and good, that dark and evil, do not always walk hand in hand. The gift of light can reveal only to blind. A part may become clear while the whole, through the same act, becomes obscured or is even blotted out by the clarity of one detail. Thus blinded are those who do not see the light’s potential for destruction, they believe that sight is the only sense they will ever need. In the same manner dark’s concealment is not purely evil. Often does evil cling to dark, just as the blind cling light. They think only evil, benefits from the concealment. Time spent in such darkness brings valuable lessons and evil may hind in the blinding light. To comprehend a universe, one must understand the light and the dark.

After seeing it the teacher who runs Mimesis submitted it to one of the prose contests and it won for my grade; Mimesis is a group in my school that puts out an annual publication containing the best art and writing from students and teachers and runs several art and writing contests. After writing it I didn't have time to edit it so it is somewhat choppy sounding but it still sounds pretty good and what it explores ties into the psychology and self-exploration stuff I'm interested in.

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#2 2009-05-17 00:45:56

wolfsongx
Member
From: Tennessee
Registered: 2007-11-21
Posts: 14770

Re: A prose piece I wrote in school

I think it is thoughtful and well written.  I like how you compare people clinging like a child to a blanket.  Very cool!


A harmonic sound such as a vibrating string is one in where the harmonics are mathematically related by what is called the harmonic series.
I wanna win your heart and take you to another place you never thought or could dream of.  -- The Halo Friendlies

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#3 2009-05-18 19:45:05

bdk336
Member
Registered: 2009-03-31
Posts: 277
Website

Re: A prose piece I wrote in school

thanks (cheering at finally getting a comment on this), actually to be honest I haven't even read it in over a month, I didn't even look at it when I pasted it from the word document since I was rushed for time.

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#4 2009-07-06 15:01:48

Grayle
Literary Lycanthrope
From: My Desk. Duh.
Registered: 2007-09-04
Posts: 2006
Website

Re: A prose piece I wrote in school

Very nice, bdk.

  I enjoyed the explanations from the viewpoint of the cosmic relationship between light and dark - not as the polar opposites encompassing good and evil, but as unintentional banners for those who claim good and those who claim evil. I like how you described the evil hiding in the light, and unnecessary fear of dark hindering a person's understanding of universal truth.

  I also noted the irony of your first reply coming from the author of Scotophobia, but I digress...

The dichotomy between these two fundamental, iconic states of existence has captured the interest of storytellers since the very beginning, as well as their audiences. However, your description does not personify the dark as evil, like those stories often do. In fact, in a subtle way, it chastises those who fall prey to such ignorant thinking and encourages the understanding of that which we do not understand. From a shallow viewpoint one might think you were dissuading the telling of stories of good versus evil, but a deeper look shows you are encouraging said stories without typecasting light and dark as the atmospheres for said opponents.
 
  I can certainly see why your teachers wished to submit it and why it won; it's a wonderful piece.

  I agree with you on the technical points. The paragraph is a little repetitive in places, and it's unfortunate you didn't get to clean it up before submission. However, the philosophical foundation is solid, and the paragraph could easily be expanded to an essay as you elaborate the points.

  Thank you for sharing this with us, bdk. I Really enjoyed it.


To thy known wolf be true...


"Yay! We're Doomed!"  -- Gir

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#5 2009-07-06 21:48:09

Bluemoon
Member
From: Shadows of Insomnia Castle
Registered: 2009-06-18
Posts: 34

Re: A prose piece I wrote in school

To me it was very good. I liked how you said that light and dark need each other.
I also liked that you believe that people need to understand light and dark to understand the universe. Very thoughtful.


Booms are for bombs. Pows are for punches!
Know how to wield a weapon, then your a survivalist.

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