The Werewolf Caf The Werewolf Caf

You are not logged in.

#1 2009-01-09 09:19:05

Poncho
Stole your Duvet
Registered: 2008-10-08
Posts: 2206
Website

A Short Story by me. Devour

This is my first story written actually down that I personally myself like. I decided to take away alot of the perceptions and feelings shared in a story in an attempt to keep the story brief but enjoyable but concentrating on one characters view. A very narrow veiw but one that hopefully will be enjoyable to read. Horror, slight adult themes and occassional swearing will be seen here. Hope you enjoy as much as I was disturbed by thinking about this sunny (yet surprisingly cold morning) whilst drinking my coffee and figured "hey, Im gonn atype that down and share it"

When I typed it down first I had the main characters views and speech under a different font to be noticably different to aid keeping track of the story as there at points can be a lot of detail or points that could be missed if read casually. So here I've used Italics to show the difference between the main charcter thinking or speaking and the others involved. I hope it works. Aaaaaaaaaaaadios. Ohh and feel free to let me know what you think. yes even you Blue. *Sigh* and........begin



Devour

Its night, not much darkness even at this time in the city. Bright lights, artificial, don’t like them, makes it easier for prey to see me. Not here though. Urban renewal, Urban rejuvenation, humph. Seems stupid. Creating patches of wilderness in the city. Bushes and topiary’s advertising its benefactors, plants suffocating in pollution, people marvel at them…..humph……watching the plants choke and die, slowly, don’t even realise.

Enough here for me to cover, breathe hangs in air……Frozen? Enough green here to hide excited breath. There! There she is. My everything, my new love…….my prey. Meat for the ‘Beast’.

Eye’s focus on her walking the artificial floor, beneath the artificial lights. To an artificial dream perhaps?
Stupid dream. Hair long, flowing, ebbing across her face, gold like sun. Face fine, strong, mind at peace? Mind in ignorance to that she is prey? Humph …….Artificial mind!
I see you. Different but the same, Different to the other prey. More confident, cleaner, no bad habits, will have better……taste, warm. Does her breath freeze I wonder? Humph…..different and better than those street bitches, but prey none the less. Meat. Meat for the ‘Beast’

Watching her she doesn’t see me, doesn’t see the truth or the ‘Beast’, just see’s what she wants, what she’s been told. Lies. Her home is a coffin, A coffin of stone and steel reaching high above and sharing it with other things dead or dying. Humph….. the sky. Dark, but will be lighter, full moon tonight. Humph should be red. Must prepare must be ready, quarry safe in bed soon. Then the ‘Beast’ will feed, stomach will be full, insides feel like ice, made warm  again by life blood  and flesh inside me. Rub hands for now……….must go…..be ready….must….humph?!!!!

Dark again, no. Cant see.
Head hurts, lying down, foetal. Something soft on face. in Bed? Muffled sounds, metal on metal, Locks?
Black out again, before the hunt? Before ready? Humph…not lying down. Seated, feet on floor arms restrained, tied…….Cant restrain the ‘Beast’ ………for long.


“Dammit, you awake already? you a tough lil sunvabitch”

Hands around me…..don’t touch…don’t touch me….. Sack removed from head. Eyes open, pierced by bright light, artificial, don’t like it. Brain fuzzy, hurt, light hurts too, see shapes flickering. Moving away……..scared of me. Good. Should be.

“Wakey wakey…… Leonard”

Something hits chest

“Freaking idiot…..”

Laughing , laughing at me, don’t like it

“……..kept your wallet on you….Leonard Kovacs”

Keep using old name, Don’t like it. See him now. Man, in my face, spitting as he says my lying name, still….a man none the less. Prey.

“what you doing, Skulking in bushes Leonard? Peeping, were you peeping Leonard? Streets aren’t safe Leonard, haven’t you heard? There’s a murderer on the street. Cannibal apparently”

Not cannibal, not my……..species, prey. Stupid man. Been lied to, thinks he’s safe

See room now, small, brick walls, grey, light from ceiling, small window. Humph………just another coffin. See silhouette tree’s, moon almost up, almost full. Almost my time. Humph….trees, not in city any more. Good, outside no artificial lights, no artificial sounds, no cameras, no witnesses. Very good. Stupid man.


“nothing to say aye Leonard, never mind, don’t have anything I wanna hear anyway I bet…..oh what’s that got ya attention there? The window?!! Sorry pal that’s too small for you to get out of, you going no where, you my lil friend are trapped.”

Trapped…..Humph. Yes, but you are trapped with me………and the ‘Beast’

“You smiling Leonard? I’ll be damned..” 

Yes, yes you will be

  “what’s so funny Lenny? Ahh man if my hunch is right it cause the killings by the ‘Beast’ was by a guy called Leonard, yeah that had me laughing too. Have me laughing all the way  to bank I’m sure.”

“Not…….. My……… Name”

“Wassat? Well I guess it don’t matter much anymore now does it Lenny”

Don’t like it, don’t like him, not usual prey but will do, must wait, let it build wait for my time. Stupid man with stupid life. Should be in bed, dreaming artificial dreams, to be ready work artificial job in the morning, humph…….he’ll be tired soon. Thinks I’m his meal ticket. Another artificial dream. His face when he realises……..mmmmmm savour that .

Noises, metal on metal, locks? Knocking on door. More Prey? Tiresome now. Another man. They whisper, look at me. Scared, they should be. Good.


“f’kin ell, Lenny this is my brother…” 

Don’t look like brothers, Breeders! Different dads I bet, vile breeder mother like all mothers! City full of vile Breeders!

“… Been to your flat. Did tell you it was stupid keeping a wallet on you. Almost as if you expected one day to get caught. Is that it lenny? In case you weren’t taken alive you wanted the world to know who you were right? TV, magazines, Internet, hell they churn out books everyday on serial killers. Infamy right ! Infamy infamy, the worlds got it in for me?…” 

Mocking me, don’t like it

“….HA, well what we got here aye? “ 

They have my bag, my things, my trophies. Rifling through it, touching my things, my things with their filth, their polluted breeder hands, their smell on my things. Don’t like it. Will KILL SOON 

“… torn clothes, dresses, what are these? Name tags? gently caress Lenny you get some of these people on their way home from work? Dump the bodies but keep the name badges that’s messed up man.”

Humph…Think im smiling, they’ve brought my stuff to me, no need to go home after tonight. Good.

“Ok Lenny im sold, this room seen some bad shite over the years, guess  one more aint gonna hurt it none, might as well be you!! Me!! My Bro!!! and these four walls gonna have it out some”

Their removing their jackets, Street Gangsters? 

“ excuse us wont you, don’t wanna get any blood on them” 

Stupid. Cant hurt me, Cant hurt the ‘Beast’ 

“but punks like you, well we gotta be rough on ya, cant have people like you getting everyone all scared. Not in our Neighbourhood.”

humph……..Vigilantes? 

“now you be a good boy and take what’s coming to ya”

taking off their t-shirts? See their flesh?!!!!!! Smiling….Depraved smiles Huh??……..Rapists??!! NO!!…….Not to me……..Not like this………not ever again ‘Beast’ will devour them ALL.

Hands cant break wooden slats on chair, cant reach knot. Moon nearly here, ‘Beast’ close. Two of them…….both prey. Stand, rush, attack them NOW!!!!!

“RAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH”

Don’t see me coming hear me first upon them as ‘Beast’ unleashes, chair will break hands will be free……….Humph?

Oommpffff
Wall hurts


“Sit the f**k back Down Leonard” 

Big foot, fast, knocked ‘Beast’ and chair back far, wall hit harder, chair broken now, pain………no! no pain! Hands free. See the window, Moon Full. Its time.

“’BEAST’ I AM ‘BEAST’” Hands free now, Stand. Stand up watch them run “YOU FILTHY F’kIN BREEDERS, RUNNING AROUND LIKE YOU KNOW, LIKE YOU KNOW ANYTHING, LIES, LIES YOUR HEADS ARE FULL OF LIES. I WILL SHOW YOU TRUTH, TRUTH OF LIFE……..IT ENDS. YOU ARE PREY, WEAK DELUDED PREY. YOU WILL BE DEVOURED BY THE ‘BEAST’ I AM STRONGEST, I AM ‘BEAST’ YOU WILL COWER AND BEG TO YOUR FALSE GODS AND ARTIFICIAL DREAMS WHILST SWEATING IN THE BILE THAT YOU BREED IN………..YOU…..ARE……..MINE!!!”

They smiling at me, mocking, don’t like it.


“Sorry Lenny, hate to be the one to break this to you but……you are nothing special, you are human.”

Second Man walks to me

“and as you know Lenny,  that makes ‘you’ Meat for the Beasts!”

They change before me, not the breeders they were, aspects of the true beast now, fur, eyes, teeth …claws. My mind had been filled with lies, oh god save me, wall not far enough away …maybe …..window. No.

Insides cold, lying down again, I think there are noises, cant hear them, don’t want to. Blood on the window. Makes moon look red. New it would be tonight. Murder………………Mine.


"Some thoughts are less when spoken and some spoken words are less than the thought used behind it." Poncho 2009

Offline

 

#2 2009-01-09 12:03:57

punxnotdead
Member
From: Canada...eh?
Registered: 2006-05-09
Posts: 11300

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

WOW! That is a freaking amazing story, Poncho. The style was so unique and absoultely riveting! Though there were a few grammical errors, it's nothing big. I loved the internal musings of Lenny. Very realistic and I love the perpetual use of 'humph'. Overall, I loved the twist to the story, I really didn't see that coming. Everything about this story is awesome, Poncho. It's a very creative idea and those are usually difficult to find in online stories.
Very, very good!


I'm an aspiring bodybuilder! smile
"Be yourself to be free." - The Unseen
I <3 SMALLVILLE!!!

Offline

 

#3 2009-01-09 12:11:20

Poncho
Stole your Duvet
Registered: 2008-10-08
Posts: 2206
Website

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

No way, Really? I did good? those are some of my favourite words. Wow, Amazing, Unique, riveting, Musings, twist, awesome. creative and Grammical errors" thank you. Wait Grammical errors arent a word they are two, plus yeah, my grammar is rubbish. But all in all I think I did well. Cheers ma dear I appreciate that. Its good to see I can bring my own unique way of looking at things a little bit sideways and describe them well enough for others to understand and follow. Thank you for sayingthose kind words. I may write some more stories. smile

Last edited by Poncho (2009-01-09 12:11:37)


"Some thoughts are less when spoken and some spoken words are less than the thought used behind it." Poncho 2009

Offline

 

#4 2009-01-09 12:53:25

Cap'n Edward
New member
From: Puerto Rico
Registered: 2009-01-07
Posts: 9
Website

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

I love the twist in this story! And the concept of a gang of werewolves...I love it! I also liked the internal voice of Lenny very much and the subtle but brilliantly used foreshadowing also. =]


I have no class--I remembered as I walked the streets of San Juan--tonite I'm just an undead pirate captain. And me crew's all I have.

Offline

 

#5 2009-01-09 14:26:26

punxnotdead
Member
From: Canada...eh?
Registered: 2006-05-09
Posts: 11300

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

Ooo, please do write more stories. Creativity like that doesn't need to be repressed smile


I'm an aspiring bodybuilder! smile
"Be yourself to be free." - The Unseen
I <3 SMALLVILLE!!!

Offline

 

#6 2009-01-09 20:22:48

FenrirVik
Space Cowboy
From: Home
Registered: 2007-11-13
Posts: 5368

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

Wow I throughly enjoyed that little story! I was sucker punched at the ending! Great, the thoughts in his mind.


Synchronicity

Offline

 

#7 2009-01-10 14:57:52

Poncho
Stole your Duvet
Registered: 2008-10-08
Posts: 2206
Website

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

cheers my homies, now my ego is all big and fluffy. Which is good. big_smile
I may have some more poncho-centric stylie stories buzzing around the old noodle wink


"Some thoughts are less when spoken and some spoken words are less than the thought used behind it." Poncho 2009

Offline

 

#8 2009-01-10 22:29:11

FenrirVik
Space Cowboy
From: Home
Registered: 2007-11-13
Posts: 5368

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

Cool, I can't wait to read them if they exist!


Synchronicity

Offline

 

#9 2009-01-10 22:38:06

Poncho
Stole your Duvet
Registered: 2008-10-08
Posts: 2206
Website

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

doubt!! you come at me with doubt? how dare you sir thats an outrage, or an attempt at reverse psychology unfortunately both of those things only work on people with a brain that works. tongue


"Some thoughts are less when spoken and some spoken words are less than the thought used behind it." Poncho 2009

Offline

 

#10 2009-01-11 22:18:26

punxnotdead
Member
From: Canada...eh?
Registered: 2006-05-09
Posts: 11300

Re: A Short Story by me. Devour

lol


I'm an aspiring bodybuilder! smile
"Be yourself to be free." - The Unseen
I <3 SMALLVILLE!!!

Offline

 

Board footer

Powered by PunBB 1.2.14
© Copyright 2002–2005 Rickard Andersson

In Association with Amazon.com   In Association with Zazzle.com
page counter View Statistics