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#401 2011-01-08 23:19:36

clairsior818
Member
From: Florida, West Palm Beach
Registered: 2009-05-27
Posts: 99

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

I agree, I think effort, and planning is always worth it big_smile


"Life is weird, I am just trying to fit in." - Joshua Harper

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#402 2011-01-08 23:29:23

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Gratz on making the 400th reply lol

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#403 2011-01-09 08:25:46

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

I know this is shorter than what I usually post, but I haven't had much time to work on the story over the weekend which is typical for me.  I had a bunch of minutes here and there and collectively this is what I was able to put together.  I had to to do a lot of editing to make the whole scene make sense because everything was choppy due to the many broken up sessions I had to work on it.  Hopefully there's sufficiently enough description to capture the brutal moment, and to satisfy those of you who like the gruesome shock value.  I also didn't want to draw the fight out too long because there's quite a bit more to this chapter to type up before it's finished, and I'm trying to watch the overall length.  There's going to be two or three more violent memories Sean is going to get to relive before he returns to the present and we get to see what kind of condition his still living friends are in.

Read. Enjoy. Comment.


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**********************************************************************************


        It was nighttime in the woods.  Jason had just been crushed into the ground by one of the huge feet of the giant werewolf.  It had happened so fast he didn’t even have time to scream.  Sean had the odd sensation of seeing himself from above while at the same time viewing the scene as though he were watching the events unfold first hand.

        He saw himself in his werewolf from launch whole heartedly at the beast that was killing his friends.  A roar of pure rage ripped out of his throat as he dug ferociously into it's back trying to remove as much of the creature's flesh as he could. 

        It howled with the unexpected pain.  It had been a long time since anyone had inflicted that kind of agony on it.  The giant werewolf twisted its body around with a yell to match the other who had the gall to attack it and slammed him aside with a backhand. 

        Sean saw and felt himself get knocked away as he tumbled across the ground against his will.  He flailed wildly trying to grab onto anything he could reach to stop his momentum.  A solid tree bent and snapped off its base slowing him down sufficiently enough to where his claws could sink into wood and earth enabling him to propel himself back into the fight.

        Before he returned, his enemy had managed to grab Heather in a grip that was crushing her.  Knowing full well he had an emotional connection to these humans it made sure it was facing him as it lifted the terrified woman to its mouth and maliciously bit off her upper torso.  In doing so it had forfeited the precious second it needed to brace itself for Sean’s onslaught, but it didn’t care.  It could withstand anything the smaller beast could do.

        Sean could no longer see clearly.  He was blinded by rage and his vision had gone completely red.  He didn’t care what it took or if it killed him.  He was going to see this abomination torn to pieces no matter what it did to his mind or body.  Everything happened in a blur.  Claws and teeth swiping, digging, and biting faster than he could process.  There was no time for thought.  All he could do was act and react.  Blood was everywhere.  Chunks of his flesh were hanging loose even as his body worked furiously to stitch itself back together.

        He was smaller, more agile, and faster than his enormous foe.  This made it easier for him to duck and dodge most of the blows so he could get in close ripping out more of the creature’s insides, but even a glancing strike was devastating.  A single talon from it was like a sword slicing across his body.  If it cut too deep he could easily lose a limb or be severed in half. 

        Sean feinted several attacks narrowly being missed by the creature’s powerful long limbs, and had disemboweled the thing at least a half dozen times.  However, despite the devastating damage he was inflicting on the monster it never seemed to be enough.  The gashes would begin to reseal themselves before his claws were able to completely withdraw from its flesh.  He redoubled his efforts striking quicker and cutting deeper hoping the injuries he caused would overwhelm its ability to regenerate, but it never showed any signs of slowing down. 

        His body on the other hand was not able to withstand the brutal punishment it was receiving to sufficiently heal.  He was slowing down and could feel the drain on his strength.  The giant werewolf's claws and snapping jaw filled with scythe like teeth were getting closer to him with each assault.  It wouldn't be long until the beast managed to land a solid enough blow that would incapasitate him.  His time was running out and his body was enduring a toll it could not afford to pay much longer.  He was growing desperate and had to try something more extreme if he wanted to prevail in this fight.

        Sean worked outside the beast's striking range until he could get the savage monster to commit to an attack that over balanced it and create another opening.  As it lunged foward he darted in as he had done before only this time he didn't go for the center mass of the creature.  He threw himself into the things chest using the claws on his feet to help find purchase while his nails and teeth tore into the larger beast's throat.

        He  stabbed with his hands shoving his arms past the fur, through the thick skin and into the creature's neck where he proceeded to twist and pull out as much of the muscles and veins as possible.  The giant werewolf was stunned and stumbled backwards a step or two from the weight of his body colliding with it and the severe damage that was being inflicted.  Unfortunately it was only stunned for a moment.

        Even though it was missing a good portion of its neck huge it was still able to recover from the devistation almost as quickly as Sean could inflict it.  It reached up with both hands, one grabbing him behind the neck and over the shoulder, and the other on his hip of the opposite side.  Without a care to what the smaller werewolf clung to it pulled him off of its chest, tearing its throat out in the process.  It was more insulted by the desperate attack than the pain and allowed its anger to fuel it enough to retaliate.  It sank its claws in deep and in a single violent motion tore the offending werewolf apart before dropping to its hands and knees gagging and choking on its own blood that flooded its lungs.

        One of Sean’s legs, along with a quarter of his torso was separated from his body and both pieces went flying in opposite directions.  The sight of it seemed to hurt more than the actual injury.  He didn’t fully register what happened to him until he tried to get up and back into the fight.  As he stumbled to the ground, he was forced to acknowledge how pitiful his attempt was and the value of the missing limb.

        The giant werewolf recovered more rapidly than Sean was able to and it leaped on him with a monstrous roar.  He tried to roll out of the way, but his ability to maneuver was greatly diminished and the beast was able to pin him to the ground in no time.  Rather than continuing to slice into him it pounded away with its fist, pulverizing his inner organs and breaking his bones into countless pieces.  He quickly lost his ability to see and the pain from the unimaginable punishment threatened to push him into a dark oblivion.  His brain wasn’t functioning properly and his awareness of what was happening was disjointed.  He tried to regather his spirit to scream his defiance at the creature above him but all that he heard was a broken gurgling sound.  It was hard to know for certain, but he thought he might be missing his lower jaw and his upper snout was bent at awkward angle, possibly touching his forehead.

        His bones were dust.  His muscles nothing more than a mass of jelly.  He knew every nerve ending should be lit up with pain, but he couldn’t feel anything.  He didn’t even think he was alive.  Then suddenly in some far off corner of his mind he heard a scream filled with terror.  An image of Rose flashed across his mind and something stirred deep inside him.  He desperately wanted to make his body rise back up to defend her, but nothing worked like it was supposed to.  He couldn’t even identify which direction was up or down, or what position his own body lied in.

        Something foreign pushed its way through his abdomen, and felt like it became a permanent attachment.  An eternity later something else touched him, but it seemed much softer.  Perhaps even smaller.  It caused no physical damage, yet somehow it hurt worse than anything else he had suffered.

        There was no telling how long he laid there, but at some point he had returned to his human form.  It took longer still until he was able to comprehend his surroundings.  When he finally came around the first thing he saw was his Rose inches from his face, starring at him with dead eyes.  Both of them had been skewered onto a young tree that had been snapped in half at least three feet from the ground.  His body still could not respond to his demands to move it.  What he had gone through should have killed him several times over.  In fact he would’ve preferred the embrace of death than the torture of being trapped beneath the cold corpse of the innocent girl that did nothing to deserve her fate.

        Her only error was in trusting him.  This was all his fault. He had brought this on all of them.  It was his failure.  He closed his eyes wishing death would rescue him from his torturous existence.

Last edited by SilentStrider (2011-01-09 08:38:58)

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#404 2011-01-09 10:33:49

nightslayer20
Member
Registered: 2010-12-24
Posts: 11

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Very good detail!!!!!!!! Loved it!!! It flowed smoothly and was enchanting! Good job strider. Keep up the good work

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#405 2011-01-09 22:39:38

clairsior818
Member
From: Florida, West Palm Beach
Registered: 2009-05-27
Posts: 99

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

I agree with the above comment entirely!!!


"Life is weird, I am just trying to fit in." - Joshua Harper

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#406 2011-01-10 02:26:05

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Thanks guys!  I love hearing that you're enjoying it.  I'm working hard to get more posted.  Keep an eye out for a new addition within the next couple of days.  My goal is to have this chapter finished by Friday.

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#407 2011-01-10 23:17:38

WereWolfH
Member
Registered: 2007-07-10
Posts: 928

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

SilentStrider wrote:

Thanks guys!  I love hearing that you're enjoying it.  I'm working hard to get more posted.  Keep an eye out for a new addition within the next couple of days.  My goal is to have this chapter finished by Friday.

yeah keep up the good work. It's great to read cool stories when there is NOTHIGN else to do, nothing on tv...


"I got somethin' I wanna tell ya'. I'm not like other guys...

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#408 2011-01-11 10:38:21

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Thank you for your support WereWolfH.  I'm grateful that this story is actually able to compete against the shows that are on TV.  This post concludes the memories Sean has accidentally opened up.  There are more, but far too many to convey, but these are the most important ones.

Read. Enjoy. Comment.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


*******************************************************************************


        Something Gregor said to him pushed him too far.  He had been teaching him things and training his mind, but the details of it had gone hazy and all such thoughts were abandoned once the human part of himself disappeared into the recesses of his mind.  Rage and anger had summoned him allowing him to break the chains of imprisonment and granting the freedom of a physical body once more

        The all consuming anger he harbored for this vampire dominated his senses.  A distant part of him made his actions feel wrong, but he couldn’t deny the need to purge his territory of the vile man-thing.  They were enemies since time immemorial.  It was simply their nature and that’s how it was suppose to be except this man-thing didn’t play by the rules.

        He never fought like he was supposed to.  The vampire always measured its counterstrikes with careful precision.  It would cut deep to maim and cripple, but never to kill.  Every time they fought their battles would last for hours until his body could no longer heal itself sufficiently to maintain the grueling pace of the fight and he’d become overwhelmed with exhaustion and blood loss.  Every confrontation ended the same way each and every time.  The unscathed vampire would watch victoriously as his mind succumbed to his dark prison yet again. 

        However there was never any celebration in its eyes.  The last thing he would see was the sad, defeated look of the vampire as if it was ridden with guilt at what it was forced to do.

        He expected the memory to end there, for he knew that was all he saw, but it didn’t.  The scene continued to play out as if he were watching from someone else’s point of view. 

        Gregor, as the vampire was known to his other self, continued to stand over him watching, waiting for something to happen.  Slowly the body of the werewolf melted away and the much smaller, fragile boy lay in the place instead.  That’s when Gregor moved to finally touch the boy.  It was not malicious like he expected it to be, but with tenderness and great care not to disturb the raw razor cuts that were barely keeping themselves closed. 

        The vampire gently lifted the fragile human, cradling him securely in its arms and slowly extricated them both from the bloody scene.  Even though it glided across the floor there was still a heaviness to each step it took as if it had a heart and it was weighed down with grief.  There was great sorrow in Gregor’s eyes and from their inner corners emerged the only blood this creature had lost the entire night.  Two dark red tears streamed down the sides of its face.  It closed its eyes in protest at what had befallen the boy, and the vampire moved its lips without sound mouthing the words “I’m sorry” over and over again.


*******************************************************************************


        It was night time again and he wanted to stay as far from the house as he was able to.  He despised that building which constantly emanated the stench of that annoying vampire.  Every time he awoke that creature would always be present and would never leave him alone.  If only there were a way for him find it sleeping in its lair then he could be rid of the foulness once and for all, but there were strange forces in place that kept him from discovering the place.

        Likely it was these same strange forces that empowered the stonewall surrounding the house that kept it him from being able to go beyond.  He knew he could easily vault the wall, but every time he drew near it with such intentions something would always distract him and his plan would be forgotten.  To the humans this sectioned off area of the woods might seem large but to him it was a stifling pen without sufficient room to run.

        Suddenly there was a new scent in the air.  It was humans, but none he had encountered before.  Quickly he covered the distance so that he might investigate the presence of these new strangers.  There were two adult males all with a reeking stench of alcohol that permeated their clothing and came pouring out of their mouths with every breath. Why they were here and how were entered this place he hadn’t a clue.  Perhaps if he were to follow them then he might finally be able to find a way to escape his prison.

        They carried with them short metal sticks that they occasionally held close to their heads, looking down the length of it and pointing it in the woods.  It was hard to tell for sure, but it looked as though the humans were trying to track prey, but if that were the case they were doing a horrible job at it.  They were blundering through the woods, stumbling and making enough noise to alert all the insects and animals of their presence, and when they spoke their speech was horribly slurred.

        He shadowed them for a short distance when all of a sudden there was a loud crack from behind him and an instant later he felt something explode into the back of his head.  He didn’t know what had hit him, but it stunned him enough to make him feel dizzy and lose his balance.  There was another human that had cleverly disguised himself and was using his companions as bait.  They began shouting back and forth to one another closing in on the last known location of their stalker, but by the time they arrived, there was no sign of their kill.

        Confused they began to look around for the animal that had fallen, but their search was very short lived.  The werewolf held itself very still under the foliage of the forest and when the hunters were nearly on top of him he leapt out, swiftly biting into the neck of the trespasser that had attacked him.  The man’s scream was cut off as soon as the werewolf twisted and pulled removing nearly his entire neck.

        The other two companions pointed their sticks at the beast and launched a volley of projectiles in his directions that hit him much like the first had, but in far less vital areas and the tiny pellets only stung.  Their intentions were made perfectly clear with the decision to target the beast they now confronted as their prey.  They were no way near as skillful as the first man he had killed and their weapons missed more than hit him.  These were not warriors deserving of a chance to prove their prowess so the werewolf struck them quickly with more than enough brutal force to put them down. 

        He wanted to examine the men more closely to learn more about them, but before he could he sensed the vampire racing out of the house and heading straight for him.  Perhaps it was insulted he had killed these men.  The werewolf glanced down at them one more time wondering if they might be servants to the dark creature.  He snorted his good riddance believing that to be the case and left the area hoping the vampire would grieve its losses.


*******************************************************************************


        It was the third day of his rebirth.  That’s what his uncle was calling it, referring to the day he had awoken from his coma.  Sean knew absolutely nothing about himself or where he came from.  He only had the word of his uncle Gregor and that of his servants to help him put back together the pieces of his shattered life.

        Everything felt strangely alien to him, including his own body.  Whenever he used his left arm to pick up anything it seemed wrong, as though the arm wasn’t his and belonged to a stranger.  He’d stop what he was doing and lift it up in front of him trying to figure out why he felt such things, but of course there wasn’t any answer to be had.

        He felt disconnected with all the things around him, including himself.  Especially himself.  The food he ate was bland and tasteless no matter how many different spices Rebecca used.  He didn’t understand music or poetry and why some of it was considered beautiful and supposedly moved the spirit.  Nothing in life seemed to evoke the slightest amount of passion within him.  Nothing except when Gregor was around.

        There was something there deep within himself like a dormant power, stirring waiting for the right moment to emerge.  He wasn’t sure what it was, or if it was supposed to be good or bad, but he definitely knew he wanted more of it, and to understand why he only had these so called feelings when he was around Gregor.

        Sean stood outside of his bedroom on the private balcony attached to it directly above the front entrance to the manor.  He was gazing out at the grounds below him wondering about the world beyond this place.  There was no reason to his understanding as to why he couldn’t leave.  However, his uncle insisted that he wasn’t well and needed to stay until it was certain he had made a complete recovery.  The possibility occurred to him that Gregor might be lying for some reason, because Sean felt perfectly healthy, just filled with a lot of unanswered questions and a need to understand what his place was in this world.

        Sean’s thoughts were disturbed by a knock on the bedroom door.

        “May I come in?” Gregor asked politely.

        “This is your house, isn’t it?” Sean replied with a complete lack of emotion.

        “Yes it is, but it is also your home, and this is now your personal room.  I am respecting your space by asking permission to enter.”

        Sean simply shrugged showing he didn’t care what the man did.

        Gregor waited a moment giving his nephew a chance to respond.  When it became apparent there was to be no invitation he entered anyway and joined his nephew out on the balcony.

        “I want to leave here tomorrow morning,” he told his uncle as if he were stating something that was fact and no one was going to be able to prevent him.

        “Why?”

        “Because I want to see what’s out there.  I want to know where I come from and who I am.”

        “I already told you where you come from and what’s out there,” Gregor explained, but Sean couldn’t accept his word.  The points his uncle made were as hollow as he felt inside, except for the fact the power was beginning to expand within him again, and it seemed to come alive more quickly than it had on past occasions

        “Yes, but I want to see it for myself.”  He told his uncle, raising his voice to challenge Gregor’s authority.  What right did he have to tell him what to do?

        “You must stay here for now until I can determine that you have made a complete recovery.” It was his uncle’s reason, but Sean was getting tired of hearing the meaningless excuse.  There was no proof he was ill. “There will be plenty of time later for you to explore the world.”

        “I think you’re lying to me,” he accused. “I don’t believe there is anything wrong with me, and you want me to stay to suit yourself.”

        “To what purpose would that serve me?”

        “I don’t know, and I don’t care.  I’m walking out of here in the morning.”

        “You must not.” Gregor’s muscles were tightening in preparation for the actions he was suspecting his nephew might initiate.

        “Are you going to stop me?”

        “If you force me to, then yes, I will.” His voice dropped when the last words left his mouth, and Sean could feel the implied threat.

        The unknown power he felt in his chest was beginning to radiate outward and was spreading into his limbs.  The sensation engulfed his head and he was swimming in the overwhelming sensation of this mysterious strength.  It was telling him he could do anything he wanted, and absolutely no one could stop him.  The feeling made him smile and he found himself looking forward to seeing his uncle try to stop him.

        He looked over at the man at that moment and wondered why wait.  Gregor had already made his intentions clear, pronouncing himself as an obstacle.  Sean could remove him and be on his way this very evening.  His hands extended automatically reaching out for his uncle’s throat.

        Gregor watched the deliberate gesture and warned him with a growl that peeled back the corner of his lip revealing teeth with elongated canines.  He was responding to Sean’s aggressiveness and he could feel his own desire to smash this insolent whelp aside, teaching him to respect his elders.

        Sean ignored the growl and in a blink of an eye Gregor locked onto both of his wrists and twisted viciously, hurling the boy back into the bedroom where he cleared the floor all the way to the other side crashing hard into the wall.  His nephew was taken completely by surprise and couldn’t comprehend how his uncle could possess such speed and strength.  If he had more presence of mind he would’ve remained stunned and marveled over how Gregor was able to do what he had just done, but that was not the case.

        Sean got his feet under him and steadily rose from the floor keeping his eyes locked onto his uncle.  A growl emanated from his own mouth imitating his uncle’s as if it were a declaration of acceptance to the unannounced challenge.  He could feel his throat vibrate deeply as his own inner strength set his blood on fire.  His skin was a raging inferno and he could feel himself radiate an excessive amount of heat.

        Suddenly something popped in his shoulder and his chest began to swell.  He was momentarily distracted from while he stared at his shoulder in confusion trying to understand what had just happened.  Something wasn’t right, but he didn’t know what it was.  He glanced up at his uncle with accusing eyes, and fury consumed him entirely.

        The next thing he knew his joints were popping all over his body and his muscles expanded.  His neck grew so thick he could no longer get air into his lungs and a sense of panic dulled the edges to his anger.  All over his body white hairs sprouted, pushing their way out of his skin like a million tiny needles and hurting in much the same manner.  His clothing was being pulled tight over his body and he clawed at it instinctively trying to remove it as quickly as possible.  Without realizing it his shirt and pants fell away from him in shredded ribbons due to fingernails that had become blackened razor edged points. 

        The worst part was when he felt the transformation split his head.  It was like he had just run face first into a wall and was blinded upon impact.  His face exploded outward with the counter pressure from the bridge of his nose down to his lower jaw and it seemed as though all of his teeth must’ve fallen out.  His senses were whirling about sending him incomplete and garbled messages that were incomprehensible.  He couldn’t get his mind to process what was going on

        He desperately wanted to open his eyes so he could see what was happening to him.  Then suddenly the haze disappeared and he got his wish.  He could see perfectly well.  His eye sight was dramatically improved and he saw light where shadows once were.  He could hear everything, smell everything, and he was assaulted by the presence of the vampire permeating the environment.

        Despite the fact his body was still in a complete state of chaos, and his flesh all over was bubbling like a sickly tumor out of control, he wildly launched himself at the offending creature.  There was no stopping it, like watching a head on collision in slow motion split seconds before impact.  It was inevitable and utterly savage.

        The deformed wolf creature didn’t stand a chance as the vampire cut into him relentlessly and without mercy.

Last edited by SilentStrider (2011-01-11 18:43:29)

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#409 2011-01-11 11:47:09

mrRW
Member
Registered: 2009-12-01
Posts: 127

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Echoing the "great detail" and a great choice of crucial memories!

Maybe at this point it might be slightly unclear as to whether Sean is viewing his werewolf self 's memory or his own:

"He expected the memory to end there, for he knew that was all he saw, but it didn’t.  The scene continued to play out as if he were watching from someone else’s point of view. "

That type of thing would be the only thing I could say to look back on.

Overall, more great stuff!

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#410 2011-01-11 18:53:28

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

I agree with you RW.  It is fuzzy (hey, that's kinda punny) as to which one of his personalities is seeing all of this, and I admit it wasn't something I really considered until I was working on the third memory.  When I saw which perspective seemed prominent I started to say to myself it should all be from his werewolf side, but as his life was playing backwards in sequence I began to wonder at what point did he develop this split personality?  He wasn't always like that.  I know I'll have to sweep some of this memory recalling bit clean, but I hope to expand on it a little more with some of the characters (like Tara's, Chris', and Sean's, and ultimately Gregor's) take on it and as to the purpose of the memory block being there in the first place.

I'm pressed for time atm, so I can't say all I want right now.  I'll check here again later tonight or early morning after I get done with the grave shift.

Last edited by SilentStrider (2011-01-11 18:54:40)

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#411 2011-01-12 00:47:37

mrRW
Member
Registered: 2009-12-01
Posts: 127

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Definitely not urgent and possibly no changes needed as its very good as is.  Just something to look over/be aware of once your done w/all of this part of the story.

Last edited by mrRW (2011-03-02 17:40:03)

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#412 2011-01-12 18:10:10

clairsior818
Member
From: Florida, West Palm Beach
Registered: 2009-05-27
Posts: 99

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

This is an awesome segment, You are very consistent in your awesomeness big_smile


"Life is weird, I am just trying to fit in." - Joshua Harper

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#413 2011-01-13 08:53:46

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

All right!  I had a pretty good chunk of time to get more to a decent part part of this chapter closer to it's conclusion, but I'm still not quite there.  I may have another two or three pages to type up to wrap a few loose ends, but I'm uncertain how long it will take me to complete the last bit.  I wanted to at least get this posted for your reading pleasure and hear what you all had to say about it.  Well, let me say no more, an let the tale speak for itself.

Read. Enjoy. Comment.

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**********************************************************************************



        There were so many more memories that overflowed into Sean's conscious mind.  Most had to do with the terrible fights he and his uncle had partaken and all the physical damage he endured tempered with the painful regret Gregor harbored within himself.  Sean never knew how badly he had been beaten, especially early on when neither one of them were able to resist their urges as well as they did in the later years. 

        Sean could see nothing but whiteness.  He couldn't hear, smell, or feel anything.  His mental awareness was still half way stuck in everything that had just been opened up to him, and he struggled on several different levels trying to process what he had experienced.  He couldn't tell where he was or remember where he was suppose to be, but then somewhere in the distance he could make out the slightest hint of someone singing.

        It was odd, because he didn't know the voice or the strange melody', but slowly as things began to clear, the reality of it came into focus.  The reason the singing wasn’t familiar to him was because it wasn’t singing at all, but someone frantically screaming, and the whiteness he saw was actually his ceiling.  The sound was still working its way through thick layers of wool inside his ears.  It seemed like a woman screaming and he thought he should know who it was, but that level of understanding was beyond him at the moment.

        Awareness slowly returned to his body and he understood the reason he was looking up at the ceiling was because his head tilted backwards and locked in that position.  His hands were no longer being held and his arms were now dangling at his sides a few inches off the floor.  Feeling was coming back to his body and with it knowledge of where he was and who the screaming voice belonged to.

        It was Chris, and buried within her terrible cries were Dawn’s and Tara’s voices shouting back at her with what might be instructions.  Something was very wrong and a desperate urge to get up and do something forced him out of the chair to help.  Another thing went wrong when he tried to move.  Gravity mysteriously twisted on him unexpectedly and the floor became the wall as the side of his face collided with the tile.  He half expected to go sliding across the surface of the floor and grabbed the table leg believing he could save himself from falling by holding onto it.  It took him a moment to get his bearings and when he did it became apparent that gravity hadn’t suddenly gone crazy, it was his perspective.  As soon as he reasoned it out he attempted to get his feet under him and stand, leaning heavily on the table to maintain his balance.  In the midst of that minor struggle his senses cleared up even more and he could comprehend the words he was hearing.

        “THEY'RE EATING ME!  GET THEM OUT!” Chris was yelling her head off, and even though he couldn’t see her he imagined she was thrashing about wildly due to the changes in pitch.

        “You’ve gotta keep her arms down!” That had to be Tara’s voice.

        “I’m trying!  She’s moving too much!” Dawn shouted back at her caught up in the situation and full of panic.

        “Watch out she’s…” Tara’s warning was cutoff short with the sound of her body crashing into what was probably the book shelf.

        “T!”

        “I’m fine!  Get her!” Tara ordered.

        Chris came tearing around the corner into the kitchen frantically clawing at her neck and stomach.  There were deep scratches down the length of her neck and where he could see the skin of her belly gouges running across it at many different angles.  Her shirt and pants had splotches of blood all over them and she was making everything worse the more she scratched and dug at her skin.  Her eyes were bulging out of their sockets and her face was red and damp from hysterical tears.

        "OH GOD!  THEY’RE STICKING TO ME!  GET ‘EM OFF!" One hand continued to scrape across her stomach and she brought the other down raking it hard on her forearm leaving a red trail in its wake.

        Sean was still working hard to figure out what was happening, but when he saw the blood on Chris, the crazy look in her eye, and the self mutilation nothing else was important.  The why of it didn’t matter.  He was only concerned with getting her to stop before she caused serious damage to herself.

        His perception snapped into focus and he threw himself at her, gripping her arms saving her from herself.  She was slippery from the blood and he had to clamp down her even tighter to maintain his hold.  She fought against him with the strength of a madwoman, pulling, pushing, and kicking.  She was so desperate to continue scratching herself she didn’t care about her balance, and Sean was deadest against letting her go so they both fell over into a twisted pile of limbs that never stopped thrashing about.

        The next thing Sean knew Dawn was suddenly there grasping her legs doing her best to reduce her ability to move.  In the process of wrapping her arms around her legs one of Chris’ knees hit her solidly on the side of the head, but to Dawn’s credit she ignored it and held on tight. 

        “AAAAA!  YOU’RE LETTING THEM KILL MEEE!” Helpless tears were being shaken from her head, and she never once stopped struggling.  Listening to her requests and what it suggested only made them wonder what kind of horrible thing Chris thought was happening to her.

        Tara ran into the room an instant later dropping to the floor next to them and grabbed a hold of her head which Chris was whipping from side to side crying out at the top of her lungs for her friends to let her go. “Chris!” Tara yelled over her. “Chris, you have to look at me!”

        Her eyes continued to dart from side to side frightened with what was happening and fighting with herself to remain still enough to see if Tara’s suggestion might make her situation better.

        “Chris I need you to open your mind back up!  I need to see what’s going on inside you!”

        Chris’ eyes opened wider and it looked as though she was exerting all of her will to keep them open and to concentrate on doing what Tara was telling her to do.  The moment was shattered when she tried to lift her head and look down at herself.

        “No.  No. NO!  NO!  THEY’RE CRAWLING ONTO MY FACE!  YOU GOTTA LET ME GO!  I CAN’T…” Chris started to gag and cough on her imaginative horror and air was no longer getting into her lungs.  She redoubled her efforts to break free, but they held onto her securely and her efforts were in vain.

        “Chris!  This isn’t real!” Tara tried to convince her. “It’s not happening!  It’s all in your head!”

        Her eyes darted from side to side looking at all her friends not understanding why they would betray her.  How could they pin her down like this and allow all these horrible things to crawl in and out of her, multiplying across her body.  She had given Tara a chance to make it right, but it didn’t work she couldn’t clear her mind well enough to link with her.  Her panic returned to her, this time more fiercely and she tried to lift her legs and arch her back doing her best to snap her body back and forth with any and all violent movement possible to shake them off of her.  Nothing was working.  The things had crawled into her mouth and were suffocating her.  She was going to die and her friends were letting it happen.

        “This isn’t working!” Sean’s voice was harsh and frustrated. “Tara, you have to hold her arms and let me try.”

        She didn’t know what he was going to do or even if he had a better chance at getting inside her head than she did, but they had to do something.  Sean didn’t let Chris’ arms go until he was sure Tara was locked on tight then he took a deep breath, doing his best to release all the anxiety trapped inside of him and placed both of his hands on either side of Chris’ face.

        He tried to shut out everything that was happening and to create a calm silent island in his mind’s eye completely detached from everything that was going on.  Sound disappeared and his vision narrowed down to only see Chris’ eyes which were the only indication there was something very wrong and he absolutely needed to fix it.  He could hear the steady thrum of his heartbeat pumping blood throughout his body and clung to that rhythm as if it were an anchor to the peace of mind he needed to fortify himself with so he could in turn push his emotions onto her with the hope of ridding her of the affects she was suffering from, or at least lessen it.

        Believing in his ability to make this work Sean relaxed the shields protecting his mind and opened his heart to everyone around him.  It wasn’t just Chris’ raw panic he had to deal with, but also the fears and helplessness Tara and Dawn were feeling too.  He had to make himself an island of calm at the eye of a storm so the others could take refuge.  Also, if he was able to, he had to spread his will over the violent seas and force them back into a serene state.

        Tara’s emotions were the easiest to master, and it was as if she knew what he was doing and willingly allowed herself to get anchored by the stability Sean offered.  He thought she told Dawn something, but he was too far away to know what was being said.  Shortly after she too found her way to the island, and all Sean had left to worry about was bending Chris’ emotions to match what he wished her to feel.

        He exerted tranquility against the tempest of panic that had entirely encased the drowning victim he needed to save.  It was his fault this was happening.  It was his responsibility to make it right, and he used that conviction to fortify his efforts.  A distant part of him was aware of how he was locked onto Chris’ eyes and how she was similarly locked onto his.  She desperately wanted him to save her, but the fear of trusting her life in someone else’s hands kept her from reaching out all the way.  He had to dominate her fears and he made himself tower over the tumultuous seas and dark clouds.  Before diving back into the turbulence he gathered all the calmness he could, and was bolstered by the fact he wasn’t alone.  Tara and Dawn were lending their emotional strength as well.  There was trust, hope, and faith instilled in his heart, and he took it all with him with the promise he would save her.

         Her eyes grew bigger until Sean felt the skin of their foreheads touch, but the forward motion didn’t stop there.  He kept on going, falling deeper and deeper into the blackness of her pupils.  He had done something like this only once before, and that was with his first official meeting with Tara.  But this scenario was different and he didn’t know what he was going to find inside of Chris.  He could feel half of herself reaching out to him like a desperate person drowning in an ocean they could not swim, and the other half rejecting him with fear and doubt believing he would only make her situation worse and that she couldn’t trust him.

        Sean steered toward the part of her that wanted to be saved and he felt himself get pulled even deeper into her psych.  It was a rough ride as he avoided areas where she tried to eject him, and in other areas where he couldn’t, he plowed through.  Where ever he forced his way, shattering her resistance, he felt his body jolt like it was being electrified.  His muscles tensed, threatening to break the connection he was forging and push his awareness back into his body.  He reminded himself a life he cared about hung in the balance of his success and failure.  There was no going back.  It simply wasn’t an option.

        There was no keeping track of the obstacles he broke or dodged, but eventually he found himself falling past all of that into a realm of dark brown colors with red bordering its edges.  Contained within the landscape was an impression of strong independence and the scars of a lone warrior who had seen more than their fair share of battles, and survived everyone of them.  The shapeless colors overlaid one another making it impossible to tell the depth of the landscape, and somewhere directly in front of him he could detect something he could not see.  It was invisible yet there was a concept of shape and motion involved that reminded him of a ball of electricity that had arcs of energy waving about like feelers, blindly exploring everything near it.

        Sean had no idea what he was doing.  He was just letting himself be guided by his instincts trusting in what felt like the right thing to do.  He didn’t know exactly what the invisible thing was, but somehow he knew it represented the very heart and soul of who Chris was, and he needed to rescue it.  As he approached the unseen ball of energy the feelers swept over him and retracted in a fear.  There was a sense of it getting ready to run, and Sean reacted before there was time to think.  If he lost it now he feared he would never be able to find it again, so he lunged and latched onto it for all he was worth.

        It hurt.  It lashed out stabbing him with pins of fire.  He wanted to let go, but didn’t.  He held onto it with every ounce of strength he could muster, trying to pull it with him back the way he came, and prayed this was what he was supposed to do.  Parts of what he was caught on fire and melted away, falling off like chunks of melted wax.  Even as his essence broke down it fought with an undying will to heal the missing pieces.  However, it was a losing battle.  He was coming apart faster than he could replenish himself, but the healing was buying him time, and with it the possibility he could pull Chris to safety.

        The journey to emerge out of the depths of the sea was endless.  The closer he got the weaker he felt.  He could see the shimmering image of a light like the sun acting as a beacon showing him the way to go.  He was so close.  It was just a short distance away and every half he covered, his speed would diminish equally so.

        Time, if there was such a concept here, slowed down to a crawl.  Even though he was just inches away from breaking the surface the distance stretched like a hallway that kept getting longer the further he went.  A sliver of doubt wormed its way into his thoughts, and he wondered if this was it.  Had he come so far just to fail at the very end?

        He heard the pulsing beat of a heart reach his ears through the surrounding water, and time resumed.  As the beat hit its second thump his face broke through the surface of the water and a bright light washed over him like a gasp of air reaching his oxygen starved lungs.

        Sean opened his eyes, or at least he thought he did.  It was hard to tell if he had even closed them, or if they had remained open all this time.  Right in front of him were Chris’ eyes, sitting very still and staring just as deeply as he had been staring into her.

        He began to readjust to his surroundings and felt his forehead was still touching hers.  His hands were gently cradling the warm skin of her face.  She exhaled a breath of sweet air which flowed over him in a soft caress.  She was herself again.  She was alive.

        Her eyes blinked and the moment was lost.  Whatever they were feeling, whatever intimate connection they had made vanished literally in the blink of any eye.  Sean suddenly realized how close he was to her and that he was well past the thresh hold of her personal space.  The awkwardness was stunning and he quickly lifted his head and backed away, while glancing at the rest of his surroundings.

        Dawn had apparently let go of Chris’ legs and moved up alongside her shoulders where she was holding one of Chris’ hands and the other had been on the back of his neck.  Tara only moved slightly from where he remembered her last and was touching both of them much the same way Dawn was.  He felt like standing up and when he did he moved too quickly and started to stumble backwards. 

        “Watch it!” Tara tried to warn him but by then it was already too late and there was no stopping himself.  He smacked into one the chairs knocking it over and his back scraped down the edge of the table.  She jumped up and rushed over to Sean making sure he didn’t try to get back up without assistance.

       â€œI don’t know what you just did, but whatever it was seems to have worked,” Tara told him as she helped keep him steady and let him take a seat.  Chris still lay on the floor and Dawn remained at her side making sure she’d be all right.  She blinked her eyes as though she were still waking up from a dream that danced at the edges of her consciousness and was slipping away from her more quickly than she could recapture it.  She started to roll to one side propping herself up on one of her elbows, but Dawn was right there ready to keep her from moving too fast, and to make sure she was no longer going to hurt herself.  Chris winced in pain when her movement stretched the skin of her stomach and gingerly she lifted her shirt up to asess the damage.   

        Chris finally found her voice asking, “Damn!  Did I do this to myself?”

        Tara met her question with a question. “What’s the last thing you remember?”

        “Bugs and worms,” was her response and her face contorted into a look of disgust.

        “Well you’re safe now,” she smiled with relief, thankful they had been able to weather the storm.  She looked at Sean about to say more, but stopped when she saw him looking back at her, shaking his head with a pleading look not to.  Instead of giving Sean credit she simply reiterated what she had just spoken. “You’re safe now.”

        After making sure Chris wasn't going to sit up right away Dawn rushed to the bathroom and brought back several damp washcloths.  She immediately started to tend her wounds washing away the blood so they could be seen more clearly.  All the while Chris protested trying to get up off the floor insisting it didn't hurt and wasn't worth the fuss she was making over it.  Tara was about to help, but recognized their unwilling patient wasn't going to tolerate very much especially if she joined in.  Eventually Dawn had to concede as Chris' determined attitude over powered the tender care she was receiving and made Dawn help her to her feet.  It was likely the only reason she wasn't more forceful in making sure Chris didn't stand was because the gouges weren't that deep and she thought that Chris might actually be telling her the truth when she said she wasn't in pain.
 
        “Are you sure?” Dawn questioned with a look of concern as if she wasn't completely sure Chris wouldn't topple over in a moments notice.

        "I'm fine!  I'm fine."

        Dawn gave a resigned sigh and settled back against the counter alongside Chris. “Well then, can somebody please tell me what all just happened?"

        “I’m sorry,” Sean answered her, but he met Chris’ eyes when he spoke the apology. “It was my fault.”

        Dawn stared at him with a questioning look, hoping to receive a more detailed answer, while the look Chris gave him was one of suspicion.  They both didn’t say anything and waited for either Tara or Sean to elaborate.  For Dawn’s benefit Tara began with what they discovered while searching Sean’s mind.

        “We found some memories Sean’s uncle apparently blocked from him, and when we broke through, I believe it triggered a mental trap which Chris took the brunt of it.”

        "Oh, wow,” Dawn exclaimed in amazement. “Is she going to be okay?”

        “Yea,” Sean replied resting his elbows on his knees and tilting his forward to where he could rub his hands over his head smoothing out his hair.  He let his hands stop halfway through the motion keeping the palms fixed on his temples and he stayed frozen in that position.

        “Yes she should be,” Tara added.

        Dawn looked from Tara to Sean. “You did something to help her.  What did you do?”

        “I… I’m not sure.  I just reached out to her.”

        They waited for him to say something more, but when nothing seemed forthcoming Tara felt the need to help her friend understand what she had missed.

        “Sean has some rudimentary psychic ability.  Nothing like Chris here, but you could consider him a telepath of emotions.  I imagine it’s a kind of affect his uncle awoke in him, but it’s an ability he doesn’t have much control over so he keeps it turned off most of the time.  Am I right?” she asked glancing at Sean for confirmation.

        “Yea,” he replied dryly still holding his head and staring at the ground.

        “That is so cool.  Why didn’t you tell us about this earlier?”

        Sean finally finished pushing his hands over the rest of his head and let it go to look up at Dawn and answer her properly.  “It’s not something I like being reminded about.  Like Tara said I don’t have much control over it.”

        “What does that mean?” It seemed like Dawn’s curiosity was endless and her questions relentless. 

        In contrast Chris just sat there staying where she was, not saying a word.  For the most part she kept her eyes on him still doing her best to make sense of what had happened and keeping her perspective to herself.  Tentatively she reached out with her mind to touch Sean’s and her eyes widened slightly realizing his protective shields were down.  She caught a fleeting glimpse of what was going on inside his head before she pulled away.  Chaos was seeping in from everywhere.  He was tumbling about within his own wild sea and the choppy waters were getting increasingly worse.

        Captivated by what she sensed she let herself take a longer look.  She felt a part of him mirroring what she felt, and she was also able to connect something that reflected Tara and Dawn as well.  Gradually she realized he was beginning to receive the emotions of everyone else nearby in the apartment complex, and the flood was starting to overcome him.  He knew it was a pointless battle at this stage and there was nothing he could do to keep it from happening.

        Chris didn’t know what to make of it.  She suspected that he was similar to the way she was and had trouble keeping others out of his head, but she had always seen him in control.  She didn’t know it was as bad for him as it was for her.  Chris found herself reaching further into his mind eager to help and eager to learn, but a powerful spike of emotion stabbed at her with a warning.

        She looked at him with shock, wondering if he had just lashed out at her, but when she saw the strained look around the edges of his eyes she quickly knew it wasn’t on purpose.  He was slipping.

        Chris was still trying to figure out exactly what he had done for her, and knew whatever it was had saved her from the twisted delusions she was engulfed in.  She figured it was her turn to lend a helping hand, but a look from him told her he knew what she was about to do, and pleaded for her not to.

        All that transpired between the two of them only took a couple of seconds, but it was long enough to make Tara and Dawn suspect something was going on between the two of them, and they were starting to wonder.

        “Please,” Sean’s voice cracked, and he coughed to clear his throat. “I need to be left alone for a little while.  I’m sorry.  I just need a few minutes.  Don’t leave.  Stay and eat.”

        He didn’t look at any of them as he spoke, stood up and headed out of the kitchen down the hallway.  His three guests were left in confusion and they looked at each other unsure of what to do or how to react to his odd behavior.  Chris understood more of what was happening to him than the others, but the fact that he didn’t want her help bothered her.  She got to her feet preparing to go after him, calling him a stupid moron and to let her do something.

        Before she could take two steps in the direction he went he came back into the room just as fast and headed straight for the window where the fire escape was.  In his hand he was gripping with white knuckles the sword that had the silvery hilt and engraved wolves.

        He didn’t look at any of them as he hurried to make his exit, and Chris could see he was coming apart at the seams looking even more unstable than he had a moment ago.  Her determination to aid him disintegrated in an instant as she caught herself wondering if he was only seconds away from transforming.  Fear kept her from taking action, and Sean paused at the window while opening it as though he had just been kicked in the gut.  Chris thought she knew why.

        “Please don’t follow me.  Stay here and eat.  I’ll be back in a little while.”

        He ducked out the window closing it behind him so fast none of them had a chance to say anything.  Sean tapped the window just before he leapt up the stairs with a request for them to save him some and then he was gone.

Last edited by SilentStrider (2011-01-18 15:26:10)

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#414 2011-01-13 19:19:44

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

I'm sorry for doing this but there's an aspect to the above post that's been really bugging me, and I'm sure you'll agree that it's something I should fix.  I basically failed to address Chris's wounds and I need to add a couple of sentences about that.  Maybe even adjust her physical movement too.  I just wanted to let you all know that and I'm fixing it before I post the conclusion to the chapter.

I also have some dialogue between the characters I'm trying to smooth over and correct.  I was super tired last night and was pushing my limits with somewhere between six to nine cups of coffee.  I lost track.  I might be able to get the ending to chapter 17 posted this weekend.  We'll have to wait and see.

Last edited by SilentStrider (2011-01-13 22:35:39)

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#415 2011-01-13 20:20:09

WereWolfH
Member
Registered: 2007-07-10
Posts: 928

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

clairsior818 wrote:

This is an awesome segment, You are very consistent in your awesomeness big_smile

Hey could you tell me what your avatar is from? If it's a movie, PLEASE let me know b/c the werewolf looks awesome!!!


"I got somethin' I wanna tell ya'. I'm not like other guys...

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#416 2011-01-14 23:52:44

clairsior818
Member
From: Florida, West Palm Beach
Registered: 2009-05-27
Posts: 99

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

"Hey could you tell me what your avatar is from? If it's a movie, PLEASE let me know b/c the werewolf looks awesome!!!"

I am not sure where I got it from anymore, it's been two years since I last found it on Google images, so I really have no Idea where to start looking. I have no clue if it belongs to a movie or not. hmm Sorry!

Silentstrider!! Again with the awesome segment! From my perspective The whole scene looks good, I don't think you should change it very much. If you want to address Chris' wounds then you can add a sentence saying that like Tara or Dawn began cleaning Chris' wounds, or you could give Sean a strange new abilitiy to heal people that stems from and arrives in that state of concentration and connection he found with Chris.
That's all that I think you should really change, everything else was amazing. I understood what you were trying to convey, I could literally see Sean's Island as well as the four of them on it. It works really well!!


"Life is weird, I am just trying to fit in." - Joshua Harper

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#417 2011-01-15 00:09:18

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Clair, I think I can sum up your post in one word.

SWEET!!

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#418 2011-01-17 08:58:43

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

I hab a code.  I trying to werg my way true it n' wrap up dis pard o' da story.  Ehg... I feel preddy oud o' it, bud I gedding dere.

smile

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#419 2011-01-17 11:23:13

mrRW
Member
Registered: 2009-12-01
Posts: 127

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

I'm going to agree w/Claire about not doing a ton of changes for Chris's injuries.  Might even just have her thrash about n avoid injuring herself...  Using some of Sean's self healing ability as a werewolf could be cool as well....perhaps slightly complicated in the explanation though...

Anothere great segment though!  Cant wait for the ending to this part of the story!

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#420 2011-01-17 12:02:04

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

I'm almost done.  Just have to proof read to make sure it's all readable.  You can expect to see the conclusion as early as tonight or first thing in the morning.

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#421 2011-01-18 09:32:36

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Okay, I fixed the format and I went back to the previous post and included a few comments about Chris' wounds.  There were no major changes just a minor bit pertaining to Dawn helping to clean her and seeing that the scratches weren't anything serious.  True to Chris' character she's quick to reject the care insisting it doesn't hurt.

Both of you, RW and Clair, are very right about not changing much to the scene.  It was more of a detail that was really irritating me that I had overlooked.  I guess I kind of pride myself at being able to get into the heads of my characters pretty well, and for me to have overlooked her wounds felt like a blaring mistake in my eyes.  I'll also say I think your idea, Clair, for Sean somehow being able to heal Chris sounds pretty cool, but I don't think I'm ready for him to be able to do something like that at this point.  There might be way for something sort of similar much further down the road from now where he could potentially pull that off, but we won't see anything like that happen until at least after book 2, maybe in book 4.  Haha, that is quite a ways down the road isn't it. 

Also like you said, RW, it would be difficult to explain.  I don't want to give Sean this type of power too early, if I even decide to, mainly because it's too much too soon.  I want the threat and consequences of getting hurt to still be poignant, and I don't want to overpower my characters.  There strengths and weaknesses are beautiful building blocks to their overall relationship and I love playing around with them seeing how it all works out in the end.  In some cases it's their failures and lack of ability to completely overcome obstacles that I like the most because it makes them seem more human (I use that term loosely) and real in my eyes.

If any of my characters are going to have the power to heal it will be Dawn, after she manifests.  I know that comment might seem like a bit of a spoiler, but you have to know it's going to happen by now.  It's a story and big things like that always happen in all the tales worth telling, don't they?  I figure being in part a being of celestial energy healing would be something that should definitely fall into her realm. 

You know for some odd reason my spell checker doesn't always seem to be working quite right because after I copy and paste a new segment in I'm seeing a bunch of red underlined words indicating they're misspelled.  *Shrug*.  I try to catch em where I see em, but not concern myself overly much because then I'll get too bogged down with fixing everything and I'll lose that forward momentum I have going on right now.

I'm already getting to work on the next chapter.  So far it's just a mix mosh of sentences and ideas while I'm doing my best to sort out all the details and add a sense of correct chronological order.  I want to say "I hope it all comes out well in the end, and you guys like it", but comparing how the story has been going and the "quality of the writing" has been, I think it's safe to say you will.

As always, please check for me the flow of conversation and let me know if there's any confusion as to who's talking when.  I know I've been fairly successful so far at making this work, but let me tell you it's not easy especially in scenes like this with four major characters, and I'm trying to do my best to make sure none of them are just sitting on the side getting forgotten about.  It's a constant (and  dare I say exhausting) effort to check each of them after every action and try to imagine what must be running through their heads at that particular second and what would they say or do, and who would act first, and if their action would alter what the others were thinking and if they'd do whatever it was they were planning regardless.  Wow, I do that?  Heh, I guess I do.  I think I care too much about them to do it any other way.

I also ramble on quite a bit too, but it's gotten to be a habit of mine I apparently get some enjoyment out of.  I'd say if you don't like it then just skip all this stuff at the beginning of many of my posts.  I imagine most do.  Heck I'd probably do it too just so I could get to the story and then maybe go back to see what all this crazy guy had to say. big_smile  Also another thing that's not really important, but I'd like to just mention anyways, is that this chapter is too long in my opinion and you can expect to see it get broken up into two when I get around to the sweeping edit.

Read.  Enjoy.  Comment.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


        “Why did he just leave?” Dawn was the first to speak her mind.

        Tara knew and said, “He needs to be by himself so he can regain control.”

        Dawn continued to look at her with the lost expression as Chris added, “…or lose it.”

        “You might be right,” Tara agreed, “but if he does then at least he has the decency to do it away from us.”

        Realization suddenly hit Dawn. “Ohh!  I get it.”

        For a short while the apartment was filled with silence and they all felt the awkward absence of Sean not being there.  The moment was broken when Serenity went over to the window standing on her hind legs with her front paws on the ledge making herself tall enough to look outside.  Her tail swished back and forth while her eyes searched for where her owner went and she meowed once for him.  Dawn went over to the poor cat believing she wanted to be soothed and she was quite eager to accept the affection, purring loudly.

        Chris announced she was starving and exhibited no problems with accepting Sean’s offer to go ahead and start eating without him.  Tara went along with it too, thinking there was little else to do now and they all might as well.  Dawn decided it would only be proper if they waited and implied out of consideration they should do likewise.  Chris’ stomach happened to growl at that very opportune time which served to end Dawn’s argument before she had a chance to establish her point.

        They occupied themselves in the mean time by explaining to Dawn all of the finer details of what she had missed right after Tara made her leave the telepathic circle.  Tara was careful not to bring up the topic of what they found behind the rusty security door, and Chris did likewise.  However, she wasn’t entirely certain Chris possessed the clarity of mind at the time to have seen the disturbing scenes.  There was the possibility the trap affected her before she was able to witness any of it.  It was something she’d have to remind herself to ask her later, but in the mean time Dawn had more than enough questions to keep them occupied until Sean finally returned.

        When he got back he pushed the window up , bareley making a sound and for a second he almost looked like someone breaking in.  They all watched, wondering if he was all right, and Chris deliberately reached out with her mind testing his current stability.  His walls were back in place as securely as they had ever been.  She started to think it was enough, but there was a look about him she couldn’t quite figure out making him seem like he was still a little off.  Perhaps he was moving too fast, or there was a lack of confidence in his step, but there was definitely something still wrong with him.

        Tara was the first to address him. “Are you okay?”

        Before he had a chance to answer Chris quickly chimed in, “No he’s not.”

        Sean looked from one to the other and then said, “I’m okay for the evening, but I need to leave the city tomorrow.”

        “Sean, how long has it been since you...” Tara didn’t continue her sentence, unsure of how to phrase it exactly.

        “…since you walked the dog,” Chris finished for her with a big grin. “I’ve been looking for the perfect opportunity to say that.”

        Tara stared at her, putting on her best serious face, “Chris, now’s not the time.”

        “I haven’t done so since we’ve gotten back,” he answered.

        “Why?" Tara looked at him trying to understand. "You told me yourself changing on a regular basis helps you keep things under control.  So why would you let it go for so long?”

        Sean met her gaze completely aware if he lied she would know, but the truth wasn’t something he was ready to tell her just yet. “I don’t have a good enough answer for you.  Life happens and I’ve been busy.  I plan on taking care of it tomorrow.”

        He felt the weight of her eyes putting pressure against him, making sure he understood how inadequate his excuse was.

        “Okay.  Fine.  If you don’t want to explain why you haven’t let yourself change in so long then let’s discuss what you’ve been doing that you feel is more important.”

       â€œI don’t want to make this the topic of the evening, so can we please talk about something else?”

        “Hey Tara,” Chris intervened, “the guy just had his head opened up to things not in the least bit pleasant.  Maybe we should give him some breathing room.”

        Sean gave her look of appreciation setting his sheathed sword on the counter top and headed over to the pot of spaghetti they had been kind enough to keep warm for him.

        “Besides,” Chris added as an after thought, “I have a feeling I know where he’s been.”

        Tara concentrated her gaze on Chris while Sean’s shoulders slumped realizing he was about to be ratted out.  Chris smiled just before taking another huge mouthful of food cramming a full sized meatball into her mouth as well.  Naturally this delayed her being able to share what she knew with the rest of them and the not knowing part was making Tara bristle.  Chris on the other hand enjoyed the fact she knew something Tara didn’t and her eyes were showing how much she was savoring the moment.

        ”Last chance if you want to confess to anything, Sean,” Tara offered.

        He resumed putting his plate together and brought it over to the table. “She might as well be the one to tell you guys.”

        Chris finally finished chewing and swallowing and further stretched the moment out by taking several gulps of ice water before she was finally ready to speak.  Tara was the only one who didn’t share a smile with the others.

        “So, Sean,” she began, “you wouldn’t happen to know anything about someone breaking into my home would you?”

        Sean used the same tactic as she had and stuffed his mouth full, but since it was a simple question he at least nodded his head.

        "Would you care to enlighten us as to what this burglar did while inside my house?" Chris finished her question and took another large bite.  As she raised her fork to her mouth Tara reached over and slid the plate out of reach making Chris give her a dirty look.  Sean had already declared he wasn’t going to say anything and Tara singled out who she expected to tell her what she wanted to know.

        “Why don’t you bring the theatrics to an end and simply tell us what’s going on,” Tara said giving her a strained smile showing she didn't have any patience for games.

        “Okay.  Okay,” Chris surrendered. “Give me back my plate and I’ll tell you.”

        Tara did so and before she could even think about pulling it back Chris swiped the plate off the table and made a smooth dash to the other side of the counter.

        “Mmm, mmm.  This is so yummy it’s distracting.  Maybe you’ll have to wait until I’m done eating first.”

        “Chris!”

        Sean kept his smile to himself and his head down, with his eyes on his own plate.  He was starving before and all he wanted to do right now was get some food inside his belly, but he had to admit it was somewhat entertaining to see the way Chris was dangling her little secret in front of her and how much it was killing Tara to not know what it was.

        “I think she’s had enough,” Dawn, who had been quietly sitting on the sidelines enjoying the show, added her two cents. “Just tell us what’s going on.”

        Chris probably would've taken the whole prank even further, but with Dawn urging her to bring the teasing to a conclusion she had to reevaluate her decision.  She admitted to herself that maybe she was pushing the envelope with Tara especially considering how she seemed to be more stressed in the past few weeks than she had ever known her to be.

        "If you haven't already guessed Mr. Goody Two Shoes over there has been breaking and entering my place for at least the past two weeks."

        "Sean, is what she saying true?" Tara imediately shot him an accusatory look combined with shock.

        He hadn't stopped shoveling food into his mouth since he sat down.  It was hard to tell if he was eating because he was starving or if it was more out of nervousness.  All he could respond with was another nod of his head, but he also included a wave with one of his utensils in Chris' direction indicating she was the one telling the story.  Accepting that he wasn't going to give any answers other than what he could shake his head at the other two girls focused their attention on the other side of the counter.

        Dawn was unable to contain her surprise upon hearing the shocking news. "What did he do to your place?"

        Chris was holding her chin and tapping on it with her index finger smiling with how she was at least able to get a response out of Dawn. "Interesting way to phrase your question, because he did a lot more to my house than just steal things."

        "You broke into her house and stole from her?!” Dawn stared at Sean, appalled with what she was hearing. “How could you?!"

        Chris wiped the smile off her face and continued to paint a misleading picture for her limited audience. "Seriously!  He stole my old water heater, tore up the carpet in almost every single room, and even got rid of some my kitchen appliances too."

        Tara at last realized what had happened and rolled her eyes at Chris for drawing everything out the way she had.  Dawn was the only one left who still didn’t grasp what Sean had done.  She rubbed at her forehead where she had a headache forming from stress.  She was partly irritated at the supposed great big secret Chris had on Sean and relieved it wasn’t something worse than what she had imagined.

        "Why in the world would you go and do something like that to Chris?” Dawn was getting increasingly angrier at Sean and even nudged his shoulder with a fist, which was more physical than any of them were used to seeing her. “I know the two of you don't get along, but that's taking things a bit far.  Don't you think?"

        Both Tara and Sean shot Chris a glare telling her she was beginning to take this little charade too far and she had best end it now.  Chris couldn’t help herself and a smiling laugh informed Dawn there was more than what was being told and she refocused on Chris with suspicion. 

        "Although, I suppose I shouldn't be too upset with him,” she spoke strictly for Dawn’s benefit. “He did after all spend the time and effort to replace most of what he took out, as well as fix a bunch of other things."

        “Huh?” Dawn’s confusion was plainly written across her face. “So he broke into your place and fixed it up?”

        Wanting to end it now Tara confirmed for her. “Yes Dawn, that’s what he did.”

        Dawn’s face started to light up with a smile and she immediately changed her view of Sean. “That is so incredibly cool of you.  Why didn’t you just tell us to begin with, and why were sneaking around doing all of this?  We could’ve been helping you!”

        Sean being a man of many words simply shrugged his shoulders while trying hard to avoid making eye contact with any one.

        “Yea!  I especially want to know why you didn’t talk to me first and felt like you had to go behind our backs,” Chris joined in.

        Again he shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know.  It just seemed like something I could do, and I guess I wanted to help.  It was small things at first, but then it quickly got out of hand.  I fixed a few leaks, which broke some pipes, which lead to the water heater and carpeting having to get replaced.  Before I knew it, what started out as something small and simple became a huge project.  I even had to call in some professional help because I had gotten in way over my head.  A lot of my spare time was spent trying to fix everything I had broken, and…,” Sean took a deep breath catching himself before he continued on ranting. “…I’m sorry.  I started out with good intentions.  It just got out of hand.”

        “I might be able to forgive you if you keep fixing stuff and something else too.” Chris looked as though she was thinking real hard trying to remember something important.” Hmmm, what could it be?  I’m sure if I think about it for a moment it’ll come to me.  How about you tell me what you’re doing first and get my permission instead of just going ahead and doing it.  That might be a bit more considerate, you think?”

        “You’re right.  You’re right.  I’m sorry,” Sean apologized. “If I do anything else I’ll clear it with you first”

        “Aren’t you being a little ungrateful,” Dawn indicated to Chris. “Sounds like to me he’s put in a lot of time and money doing something really awesome for you.”

        Tara felt the need to say something before Chris had the opportunity to twist things up again.  Plus she didn’t want Sean to ignore the more important issue of having put off his regular regiment of transformations.

        “Yes you have,” she said, “and I agree.  It sounds as though you’ve done something really good, but it’s not cool that you’ve been neglecting yourself.  The potential for your other side to get out of hand is to enormous for you to keep putting on the back burner.  You can’t afford that and I don’t want to have to see what happens to you if you do by chance lose your control.  Please, promise me you’ll take care of yourself first thing tomorrow.”

        “I will.  I promise you.” Sean looked directly into her eyes showing he meant what he said.

        “Thank you,” Tara said appreciatively. “So, now that we finally found out what the big to do was, how about you tell us all of these improvements you made to Chris’ house.”

        Chris suddenly squealed, unable to hide any longer the elation she was keeping buried inside.  Never had she imagined something like this happening to her and she had been dying for the past couple of days for the perfect opportunity to tell her friends while at the same time confronting Sean to confirm her suspicions it was him doing all the work.

        Everyone was taken by surprise with the sound she had made and how she launched herself around the counter throwing her arms around Sean in a crushing hug, but no one was more surprised than he was.  She practically screeched in his ear how happy she was then threw herself into her seat quickly telling him not to expect any more hugs and dove into a full description of all the things she discovered he had done to her place.  She told them how she felt like she had walked into an entirely different home when she first saw it.  The outside as well as most of the inside had a fresh coat of paint, the floor looked brand new, and she had a kitchen with almost all modernized appliances.

        Tara couldn’t help but to wonder out loud how much everything must have cost him and when she tried getting a confirmation he told her not to worry about it.  In Sean’s opinion it was rude to tell someone how much a gift cost, but still she could not dismiss the overall monetary value of what he had done.  He did at least admit to not having a bottomless coffer, but there was some extra money he figured he could do some good with instead of letting it sit around in his bank account.  He had to eventually tell them to forget about what he spent, and that it was his money.  If he wanted to blow it helping someone out then it was his choice and no one owed him anything for what he did.

        As the evening drew on they continued talking about Chris’ house and when they could see it.  Because of the bad reputation of the neighborhood the girls agreed on checking it out in the morning during the daylight hours and before Chris had to show up to work. 

        In the midst of the conversation Tara made an attempt to address Sean with what they discovered while exploring the recesses of his mind.  He gave her a very serious face and told her straight out he was in now way prepared to discuss that topic yet.  His reply had been so abrupt and sure Tara was slightly taken aback and quickly conceded.  She was even more amassed with how quickly he brushed over the subject and immediately jumped back into how much Chris’ house had changed.  She tried to go along with it expressing how happy she was for Chris, but it still disturbed her how he wasn’t willing to confront the deeper issue of what they had uncovered.  It was as though everyone was more than willing to sweep it under the rug and forget about it.

        She was about to put her foot down demanding that they all stop pretending and face what was really important.  However, before she could she felt Chris trying to get her attention telepathically which regrettably served to increase the pressure of her headache.  She rubbed her forehead again and opened her mind to whatever it was Chris wanted to tell her privately.

       â€œDon’t force the topic with him right now.  He’s not ready for it.”

        “But we can’t ignore it,” Tara insisted. “What we just opened up inside of him needs to be discussed.”

        “I know, and you’re right, but now’s not the time.  His mind is in shock.  What he needs right now is this distraction.  Let’s just have a few laughs and do our best to give him a buffer from what we’ve just done to him.”

       â€œWhen did you suddenly become an expert in psychology?”

        “I’m not,” Chris said in her own defense, “but I don’t have to be.  I can tell he’s not doing to well on the inside, and I’m sure the right thing for us to do is to help uplift his mood. It’s what he needs right now.  Tomorrow we can try talking to him about it.”

        “Tomorrow he’s ‘walking the dog’ as you put it.”

        “Okay.  Then the day after that, but not right now.  Trust me.”

        Tara smiled and nodded her head pretending to be impressed with what Sean was explaining to them about the work he had put into fixing her house.  The nod was meant entirely for Chris who felt satisfied Tara was going to heed her advice.  However, she still felt it wasn’t quite right to leave Sean alone to face the memories they had breached, but she also recognized she needed to trust the advice of her friend in this matter.  After all the only things she knew about telepathy and all the extraordinary things that could be done to the mind with that particular talent was what she read about in her studies at the Arcanus.  Although Chris was far from being an expert she had shown Tara she had a reliable instinct with her gift and when she was exploring new territory she generally knew the right direction to proceed in.

        Time flew and the next thing anyone knew it was well after midnight and a contagious case of the yawns was being passed around.  The girls began rounding themselves up preparing to call it an evening and “thank you’s” were exchanged back and forth.  As Tara was preparing to leave she discreetly asked Sean if she wanted her to watch out for him tomorrow just in case.  He gave her soft smile telling her how much he appreciated the offer, but he felt it was best if he was just by himself tomorrow.  Once again she made him promise to get in touch with them tomorrow if for no other reason than to let them know he was back.  He swore he would and then he walked them to their car.

        Tara hated not talking to him about what she was more than certain was eating him up inside his head behind the mask he had put on for everyone.  Her sensibilities were screaming at her that what she was letting happen was completely wrong and she shouldn’t leave him alone in the condition she imagined him to be in.  She was the only one of that opinion though and not even Sean wanted to face the issue yet.  She did her best to put on a good face for his benefit, but somehow she doubted it convinced him.  They told each other goodnight and she watched him staring back at her through the car’s mirrors praying she was doing the right thing by him.

Last edited by SilentStrider (2011-01-19 05:51:18)

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#422 2011-01-18 19:33:27

clairsior818
Member
From: Florida, West Palm Beach
Registered: 2009-05-27
Posts: 99

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Awesome segment, again,  and no your comments are always insightful I find them helpful to me when I work on my own story in fact my writing style has almost completely changed from when I started thanks to your comments. I didn't have any trouble following along the story and the flow of conversation is good. It feels natural, and it feels like Sean and Chris are actually a lot closer now then they were. I guess it seems like Chris is still the normal Chris but she seems to have gained an understanding of Sean and more than a slight attraction to him after he saved her from the mind trap. I like that development in their characters it is something I enjoy watching, it seems really honest, and I suppose that is because it really feels like  the two are falling for each other, it doesn't feel planned. Keep up the good work tongue


"Life is weird, I am just trying to fit in." - Joshua Harper

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#423 2011-01-19 00:55:53

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

As always, thank you Clair for the steller feedback.  I just had to try that adjective out for the fun it lol   I'm glad the character interaction is still going along pretty smoothly and I'm also glad to see that it's apparent the connection Chris is/has made with Sean.  In reviewing my outline which was sometime about four months ago, I was finding myself a little concerned as to whether or not I was going to have enough of an opportunity to propperly open the relationship between those two characters.  I only have a few limited scenes in which to work things out with those two and it's going to be very important to do so in the first book because in the second book (spoiler alert) Chris is going to have to endure some of her own trials while seperated from her friends.  There are some catches or exceptions in which I still find a creative way to connect her to the others, but you'll just have to wait until I can get to that part.

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#424 2011-01-19 11:30:24

mrRW
Member
Registered: 2009-12-01
Posts: 127

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

Loved the persistence of Tara in this segment as I think it adds suspense and a increases the tension level of the story. 

No worries w/the conversation and the character development is also nice to see.

Tomorrow's 'dog walk' seems like it might be an interesting time to explore whether or not all of these past events have helped Sean make any progress in terms of staying in control.  Maybe something he found in the scroll?  Maybe something he gained from the experience he had w/Tara where his werewolf persona had to pass through him?  Maybe a remembering his first transformation at the mansion?  Perhaps the suspense is making my own imagination get a bit out of control here...

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#425 2011-01-26 04:59:20

SilentStrider
Member
From: Michigan, Oscoda
Registered: 2008-09-10
Posts: 441

Re: SilentStrider's untitled story

It's been a little while since I posted anything so I just wanted to at the very least give you all an update.  Unfortunately I've been having a bad week (and more) with writing, and I don't have anything new to give you guys yet, but I'm working on it as time permits.  I've been suffering from a bit of writers block as I try to work out some time sequencing so I can type out the scenes as I've planned it years ago.  I know some authors don't worry a heck of a lot with the spefics of what all happens in between time gaps, but when there are certain things happening you can't skip winter and go straight into summer without throwing in some information about where the time went and what happened.  Don't worry, I'm not writing that large of a time gap, but there a few days I need to figure out what happens in them.  As a result of filling up this this "literary temporal gap" (doesn't that sound cool!  I should probably claim that term.  LOL.) I've discovered the potential to include a pretty sweet scene of the three girls going on a werewolf hunt to try and recover Sean.  Like I siad I'm still trying to work out the details of it and see if I can make it fit so hang in there with me as I figure thins out.  Sometimes it takes me a few days of letting ideas simmer in my head and then all of a sudden I figure out exactly how I want the scene to play out and the ball is rolling again.

I also want thank you RW for your comments.  Just as a little heads up Sean has only had 2 to 3 weeks since his experience at the Cormicks and there has been quite a bit going on since then to keep him busy.  He hasn't had much time to work on his control over his werewolf form, but don't worry there's going to be time for him to practice coming up soonn, but first he's going to lose it and come pretty close to not going back to his human form.  At least that's the way I have it planned at the moment.  We'll see how it all gets worked out after I begin posting the next chapter.

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