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#1 2010-06-10 04:10:56

Dira
Nightwalker werewolf illustrator
From: SA
Registered: 2007-10-22
Posts: 846

Mark of the Panther

The smiles on the patron’s faces were full of malice as they saw Lutra. He was a middle-aged man who walked into the darkly lit space, the features was that of a man who use to be handsome.
"During the war times… The panther’s mark was put on Lutra,” said a man; Lutra knew him as Boha. Boha wore a drab brown overcoat, buttoned up and a shard of a silver dagger in his hand. Lutra knew him as a criminal in the mob, but for some reason this young boy looked different to him. Boha Brisckillet was a man with his own future in killing politicians, for some reason Lutra always saw him at the same places as him. This time Boha had a friend with him.   
The inn was decorated with antiques lining up from the door to the counter. The bartender Mark was cleaning the beer mugs behind the wooden counter. He was an old war buddy of Lutra.
The light from the fire burnt brightly. Aexis’ inn was in a dodgy area, but it was the only place Lutra knew he could escape from the world’s misfortune. It was his comfort zone. It was only Lutra, Mark, Boha and the newcomer sitting with a lonely look on his face. All whom were underdressed for a winter's day. During these dire times the dreams still came to Lutra. Dark dreams of him where he was killing the enemy like a slaughtering beast. He could still feel the feeling of the sniper rifle in his grip. Trying to keep track of his friends in the war was fear striking. The dreams were his curse and his alone.
"His new home is in Aexis," Boha's gaze did not falter from Lutra, "Somehow he has to atone for his panther-like ability."
"Is that him?" Boha’s friend waved a weak hand toward Lutra sitting at the table.
"He's seen as the most dangerous man in the province."
Lutra grinned, hiding the fact that being called dangerous was the cause of a lonely life. His dark pupils dilated and turned cat like. The orange tint to his eyes was frightening. The bartender dared a small cough of annoyance when looking at Boha and the other man.
"Most dangerous in Aexis? I don't believe it. He looks so old."
Lutra tried ignoring the remark and he turned toward the bartender, "Cider."
The bartender went to the back of the store room, while the men waited for their drinks. Lutra wanted to shut out the men's voices, but it seemed impossible, these people had no care in the world that he was around.
"The beast is after him," playing with the dagger, Boha beamed.
"What beast?" quizzically his friend answered
"The one at the graveyard. The Wrathor..."
Lutra's interest was sparked by hearing about this new creature. The bartender came from the storage area, "Was caught up. Here is your cider." He put down the cider in front him, looking at the two men talking about the Wrathor.
"Don't mind about them, they think you'd die trying to defeat the creature. I think it's just a load of jibber jabber about you having the mark of the beast."
Lutra smirked and said after a bit of silence, "I am a creature of the night and I'll always be one."
"For once you don't sound like yourself, Lutra" his eyes were fixed on him, "You seem to be less of the man you were, back in the days you were the corporal."
"You have changed as well, Mark."
"Well I've never been the fighting type."
The men stood up from the table and Mark shouted, "You guys owe me money."
"Put it on our tab," he screamed back, exiting through the swinging doors.
"There are too many thieves in these parts Lutra," spoke Mark cleaning a beer mug with a cloth. The silence in the room was annoying, tick, tock, tick, tock.
In deep thought Lutra answered, "I'll have to go, here is your money," he put down the money on the table.
"But you haven't had your cider?" Mark wanted him to stay by the sound of it.
He trailed off while exiting the three headed horse inn. "I'm taking it with me; to see this new enemy of mine…."

Unwavering courage kept him going. The darkness outside were fading, the morning sun was rising. Trampling the ground, he hoped many times the monster would jump out at him, but it would not happen. He took a swallow of the alcohol and made his way toward the closest catacomb.
The graveyard had many open graves.
Back-stabbing thieves in this town could be found at every corner and the horror was untamed. Aexis was a town where creatures roamed in platoons. It took time to know what creatures they were, intelligent, ruthless, thieves and maybe the small hope of a new friend.
Lutra took out his dagger and walked into the catacomb, putting his arm in front of his nose. The catacomb was overflowing with graves, stacked up like cupboards, it filled the place, which looked on the verge of collapse, its stone pillars cracked from the base up. a
Shadow came closer in the opposite corridor. Moving against the wall Lutra listened closely. Tappa, tappa went the feet, it was one person, he quickly squinted his eyes to see, relaxing to see a girl come out of the shadowy side of the corridor.
The girl gave a slight smile that sent shivers down Lutra's spine, "What you doing here little girl?"
The girl giggled, "I'm just here to see the creature." She continued, "It seems that many times I've been here and not once I've seen the creature."
"You can say that again…" Lutra hid the dagger away in his rear pocket.
The girl saw the weapon she snickered, "The Wrathor can't be killed by a measly dagger, it's called a chupacabra, meaning it eats goats… maybe little children."
"Like you?" he answered back.
She walked out the catacomb passing Lutra. He followed, keeping both eyes on her. "So you find anything?"
"Well, just these clothes." She held them up for him to see. "I kept them because I like the material."
"What are you?" he asked
She smiled brightly, "Cat…" she looked unashamed.
"Give that to me," he grabbed the cloth out her hands, "You know the guy you're dreaming about can be dead?" he raised an eyebrow
"No, the scent is fresh, so the victim is alive."
"Good to know.”
"I believe that came from the victim," whispered the girl
"Bringing this creature down will take more than one. If you want to see the creature, you should help."
"Sure, why not. Where will we regroup?"
"I don't want you at my house, I'll find you later.”
"Ok," she smiled and held out her hand, "I'm Meira."
"Lutra," he stared at her outstretched hand and walked away.
She followed him. "So where you going to start looking?"
"You go your way and I'll go my way," answered Lutra
"O ok.”
For the past fifteen minutes silence was there and Lutra made his way down the road. He could hear the girl following him, his senses told him this girl was behind the statue at the fountain.
"I know your there!" he spat
No answer came and he darted through the alleyway, seeing Meira follow him he abruptly turned around and tripped her as she skidded her way by him. She fell flat on her face and sat up smiling.
"Why are you following me? Go back to your parents."
She looked up at him as if hoping for him to say something else.
Lutra said, "I told you already.”
The girl stood up from the ground and dashed off. Lutra pulled his overcoat closer and went in a huff toward his house.
For a brief moment he could feel a chill wind go up his spine, the buildings were shrouded in shadow and yet people were out and about their daily lives. The cars zoomed by and the lights flickered on and off as if maintenance wasn't there in years. The empty alleyways seemed so quiet it irritated him.
"Stupid girl."
Sitting down on a leather sofa, the room was dirty mess. The air was the smell of stale bread. He scrunched up his nose and tried to relax. He noticed he still had the bottle in his hand, tossing it against the wall he watched as it rolled down the small passage way in his house. He could hear the bottle chiming as it swiveled down the corridor. The memory of his small child crawling on the mat made him close his eyes, trying to store the memory deep into his soul.
"How long has it been?"
He drifted off into a slumber. He could make out what was happening in the dream. He watched the sweat drip off his face in the mirror. The smog on the mirror dispersed, exiting the room he made his way toward the bedroom. Lying on the bed, coughing was his wife. The doctor came up to him, "I cant do anything else for her, I'm sorry."
"What sort of doctor would say that? Help her! Give her a rabies shot! Anything!"
It was a shocking experience reliving the past in his dream, it was horrifying for him. The doctor couldn't help his wife and he ended up with a scar on his arm.
He could hear a rapping on the door. When he gazed over to the window, he saw the little girl who followed him earlier.
He opened the door only to give her a what-are-you-doing-here look. “Miera, you better have an explanation for this visit.”

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#2 2010-07-02 17:49:52

BrokenHowls
Hiding in the Mist
From: One of the alternate realities
Registered: 2009-07-18
Posts: 76

Re: Mark of the Panther

I think it's a really good start Dira smile . The only things I could pick up on were a few grammar slips 'He was a middle-aged man who walked into the darkly lit space, the features was that of a man who use to be handsome.'  'his features were that of a man who use to be handsome' might be better and ' up. a
Shadow came closer in the opposite corridor.' A bit more decription of the characters and places might bring the scene more to life, other than that I really like it and hope to read more smile


~The remaining puzzle piece in an already complete jigsaw~

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#3 2010-07-02 20:50:17

curiousape
Member
Registered: 2010-03-25
Posts: 47

Re: Mark of the Panther

I hope you continue writing
it is filled with imagery and passion
very good read
please write more


if you expect something to happen, it will; whether good, bad or judgmental 
but if you hold no expectations, the world opens up with myriad possibility

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#4 2010-07-28 00:57:18

Dira
Nightwalker werewolf illustrator
From: SA
Registered: 2007-10-22
Posts: 846

Re: Mark of the Panther

Yes I will write more, I jut had to finish writing another werewolf story, and I'm sure you guys will enjoy it. It's called lycanthropes blood moon.

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#5 2011-04-16 13:15:13

Oldwolf81
Member
Registered: 2011-02-19
Posts: 123

Re: Mark of the Panther

This needs to be broken up more...hard to read.


the texas octogenerian
wolf favorite animal

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