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#1 2011-07-26 18:08:19

Protoman2050
Member
From: Long Beach, CA, USA
Registered: 2009-12-20
Posts: 87

I'm writing a prequel to Terror in Norcal

Hi! I'm writing a prequel to Terror in Norcal, which explores the MC's memories he reminesced about while chopping wood.

Here's what I got so far:

Doug and his Mom are at a cat show. His Mom is grooming his prized Bengal, Bagheera, in preparation for her appearance before the judges.  Meanwhile, he’s mingling with the other cat fanciers and generally checking out the place. His eye is drawn to a booth where an older gentleman is selling various types of cat-themed jewelry.

“You’ve got some nice stuff here, Mr. DuPrais,” he says as he browses his table. “Hey, that one’s so pretty! It’s got my birthstone,” he exclaims as he ogles a silver bracelet, with a gold cat’s claw holding a ruby, surrounded by diamond ice crystals. “Pick something else, please,” Mr. DuPrais says. “Why, it’s just what I’ve been looking for.” “Because it carries a curse.” “Really,” Doug says incredulously, “what sort of ‘curse’?” “You will be changed into a cat.”

Doug laughs, “First, why should I believe that, and second, that’d be awesome.” “Really? I don’t think being a mountain lion in an urban area would be such a desirable thing. You want to risk getting shot, locked-up in a zoo for the rest of your life, or tranquilized and relocated to some backwoods area? But, if that’s your idea of excitement, here, take it.” “Great! How much?” “$100 plus tax.” “Okay, here you go,” Doug says as he swipes his credit card at the terminal, signs the slip, and puts the bracelet on. The ruby flashes briefly. “I guess this was meant for you…expect to have some interesting times.” Doug walks off to find his Mom and his cat at the judging station.

“Doug, where were you? Anyway, I’ve got good news,” his Mom says while petting Bagheera, who now bears a white ribbon with a red rosette. “I doubt it’s that you’ve saved 15% on your car insurance by switching to GEICO.” “Actually, I did. But better yet, Bagheera won Best in Show!” “That’s great,” Doug says as he picks up Bagheera, who starts purring and licking his face. “You’re a very good girl, yes you are,” he coos as he strokes his prize-winning kitty. “Do you like my bracelet,” he asks as he drops his wrist to show it off. “Very fancy.” “The guy who sold it to me said it would turn me into a mountain lion. Well, that obviously didn’t happen.” “You’re so disappointed, I bet.”

Later, they’re back home. Doug is putting his leather jacket. “Going out for a hike again,” his Mom asks as she makes dinner. “Yep.” “Just be back before dinner, I’m making parmesan chicken.” “Yum! I’ll see you in an hour or two.”

Doug is walking through the woods in his backyard, having great fun fording the creeks and climbing over rocks. The gem on his bracelet starts glowing. “Why do I feel so…odd,” he wonders. He begins to feel hot, and extreme pain courses through his body as it begins to rearrange itself. Before he can react, the transformation is complete, and his clothes have magically vanished. He is now a beautiful mountain lion with a shiny reddish-brown pelt, the same color as his hair once was. “So he wasn’t trying to scare me away from buying it…this is so cool,” he thinks as he starts exploring his backyard from a new perspective.

He takes in the sounds of the forest using his vastly more-sensitive hearing. “I hear something yummy,” he thinks, “and now I see it!” He spies a Prairie Falcon flying overhead, and tracks it. Sensing danger, the bird dives to attack him with its talons. But Doug swats it to the ground, and bites its neck, killing it. “That was fun! And apparently, my amblyopia is gone, or I wouldn’t have been able to catch my very first meal, an airborne meal nonetheless!” He begins to chow down on the proceeds of his successful hunt. Having left nothing but dry bones as the remains of his kill, and blood on his paws and face, he turns around for home, when he notices a glint of metal on one of the bird’s legs, and recognizes it as leg band. “Well, at least we’ll no longer have our chickens hunted by Bob’s falcon. Mom’ll be so happy!”

He arrives at his property line, but soon realizes something. “Uh-oh…how do I shift back?” He nervously paces while racking his mind to come up with an idea.
Meanwhile, his Mom has just finished breading the chicken. She notices a large, holstered revolver on the coat rack. “Douglas, how many times have I told you not to go out into the woods without your trail gun? We’re in cougar country!” Then she notices the large tom mountain lion pacing near the property line, blood dripping from its lips. “Oh no….”  She grabs her shotgun and runs outside.

“Okay, this is bad. I can’t be stuck like this forever,” Doug frets, becoming even more nervous and agitated. His thoughts are interrupted by the sound of a shotgun being racked. He looks towards his house, and sees his Mom standing a few yards away, shotgun aimed straight for his head. She fires, thankfully missing.  “Oh, come on! Good thing she subscribes to the fallacy a shotgun doesn’t need to be aimed,” He leaps onto his Mom, and grabs the shotgun away with his mouth, and throws it off to the side. Mom punches him in the nose, and kicks him off onto his back. Then she grabs the shotgun, and trains it on him again. He starts mewing, “Please don’t shoot me Mom, please don’t. I’m not a real mountain lion, the bracelet changed me into this. I don’t know how to change back,” he thinks.

His Mom notices the bracelet, “Douglas…?  It’s okay, there, there, I understand, don’t be scared, I didn’t know, and I hope you can forgive me. No matter what you’ve become, I still love you,” she whispers as she gently strokes him. He starts purring as he calms downs. The bracelet on his left paw glows again, and he’s back in human form, clothes and all. “Well, that guy wasn’t lying about that bracelet,” Doug says. “He sure wasn’t. Oh, do you still want dinner? I saw you already ate.” “The blood gave it away, didn’t it? Maybe I’ll have the chicken for breakfast; I just had a delicious Prairie Falcon a short while ago, and on an unrelated note, we’ll no longer have to deal with Bob’s falcon eating our chickens. I’m getting ready for bed, good night Mom.” “Have a nice night.”

As Doug is getting ready for bed, he steps in front of the mirror, and does a double-take. “Wow, I look amazing,” as he admires what the magic of the bracelet has done to his human form. All his excess body fat has melted away, his muscles are lean and toned, and his skin imperfections are gone.

The next part is where he and his Mom go on a summer camping trip to Big Bear, where he uses his cougar form to use an alternate route to a waterfall, as the regular trail is too difficult for him due to his depth perception issues. While he's enjoying the view, a youth leader sees him, irritates him, and finally decides to attack him when he doesn't leave, leading to Doug fatally mauling him.

Any advice? Thanks so much!


Fencing is what happens when you take swashbuckling, which is a method for nobles to create bloodbaths for insignificant insults, and turn it into a game.

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#2 2011-07-29 20:20:44

Oldwolf81
Member
Registered: 2011-02-19
Posts: 123

Re: I'm writing a prequel to Terror in Norcal

i read that part.


the texas octogenerian
wolf favorite animal

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#3 2011-07-29 20:25:25

Protoman2050
Member
From: Long Beach, CA, USA
Registered: 2009-12-20
Posts: 87

Re: I'm writing a prequel to Terror in Norcal

Oldwolf81 wrote:

i read that part.

Yes, I know. This is a prequel, which explains the flashback in the other one. I'm trying to figure out what to do next in this one.


Fencing is what happens when you take swashbuckling, which is a method for nobles to create bloodbaths for insignificant insults, and turn it into a game.

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#4 2012-08-09 17:23:41

harbinger775
Member
Registered: 2012-06-03
Posts: 18
Website

Re: I'm writing a prequel to Terror in Norcal

Nice! i loved the original terror in norcal with bigfoot and everything, and i love the prequel too!


"Human, you've changed nothing. Your species has the attention of those infinitely your greater. That which you know as reapers are your salvation through destruction. Know this as you die in vain. Your time will come, your species will fall. Prepare yourself, for the arrival." -Harbinger, Mass Effect 2, Bioware

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