The Werewolf Café / This is where my poems go

Shuri · 2008-10-16 21:18:15

Hope you like

Silly Little Poem:

Lets run, lets run
Lets play, have fun
We'll howl at the moon
And sleep in the sun
Theres no rules here
So do as you please
Just one warning
Watch out for the fleas.

Moon Light:

As I lay there in silence
And stare at the moon
My blood it stirs
The change will come soon
The misery, the sorrow
No longer a blight
I raised up my fist
I put up a fight
But i did not fight this
It just felt so right
Like I was meant to be
A Werewolf in moon light.

FenrirFinale · 2008-10-16 23:04:12

Heh-heh I really like the first one. It has a cute charm to it that really sticks in the mind. It kinda reminds me of a children's rhyme.

The second one was a lot deeper but still carried that same quality of sticking in the mind.

All in all I think they were both very good! Two thumbs up!

Shuri · 2008-10-16 23:26:45

*jumps for joy and hits head on ceiling*
I gotta stop doing that, anyway thnx im glad you like them

FenrirFinale · 2008-10-16 23:29:07

Lol your welcome!

Shuri · 2008-10-17 08:26:45

Yeah, i like to put alot of meaning in a few words as possible, it keeps people from falling asleep. I would be honored to be included in The Great List. I'm also glad you like them, id jump for joy but i dont want another headache.

punxnotdead · 2008-10-17 11:42:15

Very nice poems, Incomplete. I know there are certain styles of poetry that depict shorter styles. Personally, I don't favour the longer or the shorter.

Shuri · 2008-10-17 19:56:40

Here two more poems.

Only human:

My heart it aches
For a better life
One with freedom
Not filled with strife
The song of the wolf
It calls to me
A last request
A finale plee
I struggle and pull
Against the chain
But to no avail
Human, I remain

Follow me:

Take my hand
And you'll see
A world beyond
You and me
A world of wonders
In the night
Filled with songs
And moonlight.

Dont know if i should add more to the second one, it feels like there should be more to it, oh well i figure it out.
Hope you like

soulscar · 2008-10-17 20:37:32

Nice poems man, i think the second one is perfect the way it is, and i think the first one really is somthing too relate too

Shuri · 2008-10-17 20:43:32

The first one is about what all of us here feel every now and again.

punxnotdead · 2008-10-18 00:58:31

The first one is very enjoyable. Though short, It's sweet, so to say.
The second one, it could be expanded upon, such as surroudings, the appearance of the lover, the emotions etc...That will add for a captivating poem.

Shuri · 2008-10-18 09:48:01

Ill expand on the poem, sadly though, im single, never had a girlfriend.
Now i know whats missing, thnx punx

Shuri · 2008-10-18 23:35:49

Heres the expanded Follow me poem

Follow Me:

Take my hand
And you'll see
A world beyond
You and me
A world of wonders
In the night
Filled with songs
And moonlight.
Do not fear
Those you see
Youll be here
Next to me
Ill hold you close
To my chest
To put your fears
To rest
My dearest Racheal
I love you so
Stay with me
Do not go
Just follow me
Into the night
And fill your soul
With moonlight.

I hope this is better and yes thats the real name of the girl i fell in love with (and man did it hurt when i fell), sadly for me she has a boyfriend, but as long as shes happy i am too. Man i miss her, she moved away last year, fortunatly we keep in touch, so its all good. mixed emotions

FenrirFinale · 2008-10-19 22:55:50

Killer bro . . .

Anyway I like the extended version It flows fairly well and seems to carry a very different tune from the shorter version ( not that that's a bad thing )

I really like your poems Incomplete so be sure to write more soon! Later!

Shuri · 2008-10-19 22:58:23

I will.

punxnotdead · 2008-10-20 23:00:11

The extended version is much improved. It flows very nicely and adds to that sensual atmosphere. Very nice!

#1 2008-10-16 21:18:15

This is where my poems go

#2 2008-10-16 23:04:12

Re: This is where my poems go

#3 2008-10-16 23:26:45

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#4 2008-10-16 23:29:07

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#5 2008-10-17 08:26:45

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#6 2008-10-17 11:42:15

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#7 2008-10-17 19:56:40

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#8 2008-10-17 20:37:32

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#9 2008-10-17 20:43:32

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#10 2008-10-18 00:58:31

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#11 2008-10-18 09:48:01

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#12 2008-10-18 23:35:49

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#13 2008-10-19 22:55:50

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#14 2008-10-19 22:58:23

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#15 2008-10-20 23:00:11

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